Victors Like Us
by Ingram Solomon
Summary: AU: Peeta Everdeen's cherished sister Prim is saved from the arena by the one girl he can't stand:The Baker's daughter, Katniss Mellark. When his name is called too, they are forced to face both the horror's of the arena, and Peeta's contempt for Katniss.
1. Chapter 1

AN: I wanted to do an AU, in which Peeta and Katniss's lives were reversed. The more I thought about it, the more the two of them would have been completely different people living out their lives according to more stereotypical gender roles. Instead of Katniss being the warrior and hunter who grew up in the seam with her best friend Gale, Peeta would have. Katniss would have grown up in town, and taken on Peeta's characteristics of peacefulness, selflessness, and charm. It makes for a much harder edge to Peeta, and a much softer Katniss, though she is not without her resiliency and her desire to protect. I threw in a few curve balls to the plot to move the story along. Let me know your thoughts. Thanks!

Chapter 1:

Mrs. Arabella Mellark was not a kind woman.

Everyone thought so, though you'd be hard pressed to find someone to admit it. The people of District 12 always remained tight lipped on the matter. Arabella may have only been the wife of the late Borin Mellark, the baker, but she was notorious for never letting an unkind word go unpunished. She made friends with all the detestable people, and used her connections to her benefit in the cruelest of fashions. Everyone in district 12 equally hated and feared her.

It's a wonder how Katniss ever happened. There was a common joke amongst the town's people, whispered quietly to each other behind closed doors, that Arabella desired to be the nastiness human that ever lived, and in so trying gave birth to Katniss, finally riding her body of any remnant of goodness. Because that was the only plausible explanation of how something so beautifully pure and decent ever came from a woman like Arabella Mellark.

The whole town pitied the unfortunate spawn of the Mellark matriarch. It was no secret that Katniss had it bad. The bruises, the screaming that came from the back of the shop, the hateful and demeaning comments dolled out in public. It was all quite sad.

And though the girl had been dealt a crap hand in life, she somehow managed to bare it with such incredible grace. Her gentle heart had often got her into trouble with her domineering mother, though, managed to cement her as a town favorite by everyone else. Her smile was contagious, her laugh was musical, and if a vote should be cast, she would easily win most liked in the district.

There would likely only be two votes against her, her mother's of course, and that of one Peeta Everdeen.

Peeta's vote would always go to his cherished little sister, Primrose. Katniss's vote would easily go to Primrose too.

Maybe it was because they were so alike in nature, but in the little amount of free time they both had, the two girls were inseparable. Katniss couldn't explain why she was so attached to the little Everdeen girl. Perhaps it was because Katniss never had any siblings. Or furthermore, maybe it was because Prim had so much love to give, and since the death of her Father, Katniss didn't really receive any from anyone else. She dearly loved Prim in return and took it upon herself to ensure as best she could that the girl and her family always had bread, so that they never went too hungry.

Reaping Day: Morning

A pale and hollow light ghosted over District Twelve the morning of Prim Everdeen's first reaping. Katniss crept from her home at the first rays of dawn with her contraband basket of baked goods. She lingered in the westward facing shadows that clung to the buildings as she made her way towards the Seam.

Knocking quietly on the weathered door of the Everdeen home, Katniss looked about for any sign of life on the street. It appeared deserted. But things were never really as they appeared. She pressed her ear to the cracked surface of the door at the sound of stirring from with in. The door opened a crack to reveal the deep blue eye of Mrs. Iris Everdeen. If she was surprised to see the young woman on her doorstep that morning, it didn't register in her troubled eyes. Opening the door wide, she pulled Katniss into a strong boney hug.

"Good morning Kat," She breathed in her ear, "Prim is still asleep. I didn't want to wake her just yet." She motioned to the bed in the corner that she shared with her daughter. Prim's sleeping form could be made out, clutching a sinewy lump of orange fur that she had named 'Buttercup'.

"Of course," Katniss smiled. The bed in the opposite corner was empty and unmade. Peeta was either at the early shift at the mines, or out hunting with Gale Hawthorne. Either way Katniss was glad he was out. It never escaped her notice how he balked at her _handouts_ of bread. She didn't intend for her gifts to their family to make him feel like he couldn't provide for them, but never the less that's what they did. She knew this of course, but she wouldn't allow the young man's pride to put his family at risk of starvation. Besides, it wasn't a handout… not really. It's not that Peeta was a cruel boy. On the contrary, he was a doting and affectionate older brother and son. Yet never the less, he was nearly always overtly cold to Katniss. There was a distance between them, that no amount of kindness on her part could breech. "How's she doing?" Katniss whispered.

"She had a horrible nightmare in the night. Peeta had to hold her for hours before she finally fell back to sleep." Iris Everdeen's hands were shaking. But they did every year on this morning. This was the first year that both her children would be entered. It had been hard enough to bear with Peeta, but now that Prim was old enough, she wasn't sure she could face the day. Katniss reached out and took Iris' hand firmly, offering her a reassuring smile.

"It will all be over in a few short hours." She sought out her blue eyes, "You can do this."

"Oh Kat, Peeta's name is in there so many times," Tears sprang to her eyes. Katniss, started gently pushing Iris towards the back of the house into the kitchen. She didn't need Prim to awake to a sobbing and broken mother when she was already so anxious about the reaping.

"Iris it's going to be alright." She wrapped her arms around the impossibly thin frame of the older woman as she began to sob in her shoulder. Katniss made soft cooing, and shushing noises and rubbed circles into her gaunt back. Out the dingy and cracked back window she saw Peeta and Gale coming up the lane, their game bags not nearly as full as usual.

XXX

"So…" Peeta started. It had taken all morning but Peeta finally had mustered up the nerve to ask, "How many times are you in today." Gale smirked at his friend, but it was hollow.

"Too many times, Pete. Probably almost as many as you." He sighed.

"It's likely going to be one of us."

Gale paused in the middle of the lane. He started to say otherwise, but stopped. The odds were definitely not in their favor. He made a terse nod, and shuffled awkwardly.

"You're my best friend Gale…"

"Peeta, … don't." Gale always did struggle with emotions.

"No, this has to be said," Peeta insisted evenly, "At least it will give us some sort of peace if one of us should go in." He sucked in a long breath. "If anything should happen to me…" Suddenly it was as if an icy vice was clamped on his heart, he sucked in a shallow breath, "Prim… and my Mom…"

"I know." Gale said quietly, not needing him to go on. His hand rose to his friend's shoulder. "I'll look out for your family, the same way you'll look out for mine."

Peeta made a simple nod in response, and turned back towards the row of shanty houses. Just then down the crooked lane, he saw Katniss usher his mother out the back door of the kitchen, her arms s were slung around the older woman's shaking shoulders.

Peeta let out a curt grunt. Of course she would be here. She was always hanging around. Gale cast a sideways glance at him.

"I'll never understand that." He laughed quietly, running a calloused palm through this disheveled dark hair.

"What?" Peeta scowled, his blonde brows pulling in and wrinkling his forehead.

"If I had the lovely Katniss Mellark hanging around my home I'd…"

"Oh, come off it." Peeta rolled his eyes.

"Peeta, she's the most beautiful girl in 12, maybe even Panem, and she's kind, and funny, and she loves your family… why have you never tried…"

"Knock it off, Gale." Peeta spit out like a growl of warning. He was becoming increasingly annoyed with the turn in the conversation. Shifting his game bag up higher on his shoulder, he started once again towards home.

"Seriously… you can't tell me you're not even the least bit interested…"

"I'm not." Peeta said resolutely, as he tried to forget his dream of her from the night before. He had found comfort in denial. Gale was staring at his back and couldn't tell if there was any truth to his friend's admission.

"So… you wouldn't mind if I tried?" This caused Peeta to stop short. All the joking was gone from Gale's voice. Brown eyes met blue as he searched Peeta's face intently.

"Why are you asking me that? You know I'm not interested in her." He was a talented liar.

"I know you say that… but…"

"Go for it." Peeta interrupted with his brows down cast, his _permission_ should surely put an end to the ridiculous conversation. He started walking again, though more briskly, and soon he was within earshot of his mother and Katniss.

"I made your favorite pasty puffs this morning." Katniss smiled brightly at his mother, her tone placating.

"Oh Kat, you shouldn't have." Iris attempted a weak smile of gratitude, as she wiped a remaining tear from her cheek.

"How about we wake Prim up to a big plate of them? They should still be warm."

"What would we do without you?" Iris, smiled sadly as she followed the young woman back into the house.

At his mother's words Peeta stopped up short, and involuntarily clenched his fists.

"Easy Killer." Gale laughed, "You know she didn't mean it like that." He was right. Peeta knew that. But it still stung like a back hand. He was suddenly acutely aware of his half filled game bag. They weren't able to scrounge up much that morning.

Walking into the back of the house they loudly dropped their bags into a heap inside the rickety door.

"Peeta!" Prim came bounding over and threw herself into his arms as he scooped her up as though she were a toddler, and not a young lady of twelve.

"Morning Munchkin." He smiled broadly down at her, happy that her fears from the night before were forgotten, if only for the moment. Kissing her forehead, he deposited her unceremoniously on his bed.

"Katty, brought us pasty's and cheese buns! And she gave me these pretty blue ribbons to wear in my hair today!" The ribbons in question were clutched in her small hand.

"That was kind of her," my tone was flat, but Prim didn't notice or at least pretended not to, "Did you say thank you?" Prim nodded as she dangled one of the ribbons in front of a bored Buttercup. Prim might not have noticed his tone but Katniss was aware enough to. She was at the door in a moment.

"Well, I will see you all later, I need to get back."

Prim suddenly bounded from the bed as she went over to hug Katniss. Katniss smiled brightly down at Prim, and wrapped her up into a fierce hug. Peeta's frown deepened.

"Can't you stay for breakfast? You went to all the trouble to make it for us?" Prim pleaded. Katniss dropped to her knees in front of Prim, and smoothed out the little girl's wild bed hair.

"You know I can't, Primmy." That's all she needed to say. They all knew what she really meant. She couldn't be caught outside the shop by her mother. "I really should go, it's getting late." She kissed both of Prim's cheeks, and tapped her nose with her index finger as she stood.

"I'll walk you back to town." Gale suddenly announced from behind Peeta. All turned their eyes towards him, both Peeta and Katniss competing for most shocked.

"Uh…" Katniss stammered momentarily at a loss for words. Her need to be forever polite finally kicked in as she mumbled, "Okay… thank you." Gale slapped Peeta on the back,

"I'll be back in a few, and we can head over to the Hob." Gale patted Prim on her head as he moved towards the door. Peeta just nodded dumbly as he watched them at the door. Katniss smiled shyly up at Gale, who offered to take her basket from her.

As Peeta watched them go, a small dark fury began to hedge its way between his lungs and heart. Assuming they both survived the reaping today, he was likely to lose his best friend to that damn girl too.

(To be cont.)


	2. Chapter 2

(I own nothing- but you already knew that, silly.)

Chapter 2:

"_Where in the hell have you been_!" Arabella Mellark whisper hissed at her daughter. Cold fingers jerked Katniss back into her home, as the door slammed shut behind her. She squinted in the dim light of the house as her eyes adjusted from the morning sun. Arabella was usually not one to get out of bed before noon. But here she was, up, fully dressed. Overdressed actually. Katniss hadn't seen her nice black dress since her father's funeral. And where on earth had she gotten those pearls?

"What's going on?" Katniss asked as warning bells fired across her mind. Had someone died? Why was her mother dressed so nice?

"I'll tell you what's going on," Her mother spat, as she shoved her towards the stairs. "We have a very important guest coming over this morning, and I wake up to find you gone! Likely gallivanting off with those trashy Everdeen's! I warned you about that Katniss! Now get upstairs, do something nice with your hair, and put on the dress and jewelry I laid out. Now!"

Katniss, always the obedient one, started to climb the stairs. Suddenly the boney grip of her mother's firm grasp was on her forearm again, so tight that it was sure to bruise.

"You will behave yourself this morning, do you understand!"

"Yes, Mother," Katniss stated blandly. The hand dropped from her arm, as it always did when she said those two words.

Katniss busied herself getting ready quickly. She pulled her hair up into a simple chignon at the base of her neck, and smoothed down the flyaways. Her mother had left her a few pieces of her costume jewelry as well. She swallowed as she ran her finger over the fake purple jewel. It matched the simple lavender dress her mother had left out. Katniss had never seen the dress before, and knew that her mother must have paid dearly for it. Apparently this special guest warranted a new dress.

Katniss looked at her self in the mirror above her dresser, and saw her Father's eyes staring back at her. Everyone said she took after her handsome father, Borin. She had the same olive complexion, large almond eyes, thin sharp noise, and full lips. Her hair color was a deep russet like the bark of a maple tree after the rain. Another trait from her father. It seemed the only features she inherited from her mother was her long graceful neck, and lovely feminine form. Both of which were more of a curse than a gift.

She descended the stair quietly, skipping the squeaky step, and walked towards the small sitting room. She heard her mother with her "guest" voice on.

"I'm so very happy that we could come to such a advantageous arrangement." Arabella's scratchy voice sounded wrong as it attempted civility. Like lumpy honey laced with poison.

"So am I, Mrs. Mellark." A deep and devious voice with a distinct Capitol accent replied.

Katniss' blood ran cold, as she stopped suddenly. She knew that voice. She would know it anywhere. It had been haunting her dreams for years.

Paasch Vickram.

He owned nearly all of District 12.

Sent here nearly eight years ago, he had been personally appointed by President Snow to control both the operation of the mines, as well as the Peace Keepers. It was shortly after the arrival of Vickram that the "accidents" started. The accident at the mine that took the lives of forty good men, Peeta and Prim's father one of them. Then there was the explosion at the foundry, the roof collapse at the hospital which remained unrepaired to date. And of course the train accident, that claimed her own father's life along with ten others six years ago. Her father was barely in the ground when it started.

The looks, the compliments, the threats, the touches. They were never fully inappropriate, but never the less unwanted by the mourning eleven year old. He would touch her arm, her back, her shoulder, her neck, her hair. Always looking at her with those greedy black eyes. Always telling her how pretty she was.

In the back of her mind she wanted to scream and shake herself for being such a fool. If she was being honest, she had always known this day would come. She had always known he would come for her.

"KATNISS!" Her mother yelled, breeching the rules of decorum, "Get down here!"

Katniss turned for the door, she wouldn't step foot near him. Halfway down the hall she saw the two white uniforms through the back window, standing near the door, and dread washed over her like cold mud.

It seems he had anticipated this reaction. She was trapped.

"Katniss now!" Her mother yelled from the other room. Her feet were like lead as she turned and made her way back down the hall. If she pretended to comply it could buy her some more time to prepare an escape.

"Ahh, there she is." Her mother announced coldly. She snapped at her daughter to sit on the couch next to Vickram. Bile rose up in the back of Katniss' throat as she surveyed the stoic man in the charcoal suit. He was tall and muscular with long lanky fingers, black menacing eyes, a sharp nose and chin, and a surgically altered forked tongue. A remnant of his time as a Capitol citizen.

Suddenly in her panic, a quiet fury took over.

"No!" Her voice came out strong, surprising everyone in the room including herself.

"Excuse me!" Arabella's eyes became slits.

"I will not be apart of whatever _arrangement_ you've made!" Her voice came out strong again, though her hands were shaking, as her heart hammered against her ribs. With her words the delicate veneer of civility cracked. There was no need for pretense now.

"Yes, you will!" Her mother hissed, standing up. Like a striking snake, she slapped her daughter so hard, Katniss toppled over the side table by the chair. The cheap wood gave way under her weight and splintered beneath her.

"Now, now, Arabella… there is no need for that." Vickram's even voice filled the room in a bored monotone, as he surveyed his nails. They were long, pointed and yellow.

"I apologize for my daughter's unspeakable behavior."

"Yes… it seems she's not as house broken as you led me to believe." His tone was harsh. "Never the less, I will honor our agreement. Could you give us a moment to get acquainted?"

"Of course, I'll get you some tea." Arabella's fake smile was nearly frightening with her dark eyes. Katniss wondered where she was really going, the woman couldn't boil water.

With the hasty retreat of her mother, she was left alone in the room with him. As he stood and advanced towards her, she scooted back away from him on her hands, until she hit the wall.

He stopped in front of her, and held out his disgusting claw of a hand. She eyed it warily, refusing to voluntarily touch him. Suddenly his eyes burned black, as he reached out and wrenched her up off the ground. She cried out in pain as his nails pierced her skin. Slamming her back against the wall, he lowered his face so that it was inches from hers. She tried to turn it, to escape his rotting hot breath as it rolled across her face, but with his free hand, he grabbed her chin roughly forced her to look him in the eye. Tears began to leak from the corners of her eyes as small sobs wracked her slight frame.

"You will _never_ refuse my touch again." Katniss trembled under his grasp in terror. "Tomorrow evening I will announce our engagement, and in two weeks when I'm back from the festivities of the Game openings, you will marry me. After the reaping today, you will be escorted to my home where you will remain under supervision until I get back. If you step out of line at all or attempt to run, my discipline will be most _severe_. Your mother has told me who in this town you consider a friend. DO NOT CROSS ME." He bellowed in her face as he squeezed her chin so hard she cried out. Letting her go, she slumped back to the floor, wrapping her arms around her shaking frame.

"I'll see you at the reaping, Darling," he spat at her with narrowed eyes. With that he walked out of the room and out of her house. She was certain the peace keepers would remain behind.

His threat sang a horrifying song in her mind, and it rang like death in her ears, flinging wide one name. Prim. He would hurt Prim if she disobeyed.

Despair slithered close like a shadow, and overtook the young woman. She cried so hard, her lungs were raw, and the lavender dress was ruined by tears and snot, and spit. Until finally there was nothing left. She sat in the dark corner of her childhood home, slumped against the wall like a dead body.

She had never before thought that life was unfair. She had always maintained that everyone was dealt a difficult hand in life in their own way, and who was she to complain when so many suffered too. She was not the only one who had lost a father. She wasn't the only one who had a violent parent. She wasn't the only one who would be forced into an unwanted marriage. These things happened all the time in these dark days.

But Prim.

That is where the injustices had to end. She couldn't live in a world where gentle loving children where threatened and harmed without recourse.

Like a seed being planted, hate sprouted roots in her heart that fingered towards her mind. She always knew her mother was cruel, but she never imagined that it could come to this. That her mother would willingly give up the name of an innocent girl to be used as a weapon against her.

The object of her new emotion walked into the room.

"Oh, get up." She spat, taking a sip of dark acrid liquid from her glass tumbler.

"How could you?" It was a broken whisper full of hate. This novel tone caused a moment of shock on her mother's ashen face. But hate knows it's own, and in a moment Arabella's eyes grew maniacal.

"You ungrateful little wretch." Her mother hissed, throwing the tumbler at Katniss, it shattered against the wall wide of her head. "How dare you! I go to all this trouble to secure your future, and this is how you act!"

"I think you mean, secure _your_ future." That earned her another slap.

"He's the most influential man in 12, he's friends with the President, he can take you to the capitol and buy you jewels and beautiful clothes, and you'll live in a mansion!"

"And what will you get?" Katniss spat, not caring if it earned her another slap.

"I'm warning you Katniss… don't make me get the crowbar." It wasn't a threat… her mother wouldn't hesitate. She never had before. Suddenly the fight deserted her and Katniss started to sob uncontrollably.

She resorted to the only thing she could… begging.

"Please Momma," She hadn't called her that in years, but it was an attempt at an emotional appeal, a last ditch effort, placing all hope that there was still even a shred of love still in her mother, " Please… he'll beat and rape me."

Suddenly a brief flicker of emotion passed over her mother's eyes, and they went dark and quiet like the dead of night. She kneeled down before her daughter, and ran the back of her boney hand over the reddened cheek of her daughter.

"Oh Katniss," her voice was eerily quiet, "It's not rape if your married."

Silent tears poured from the corner of Katniss' eyes, as she slowly began to shake her head 'no'.

"Go upstairs and put some cover up on that cheek, change your dress. We leave in an hour." She stood and walked towards the door. She paused just before leaving the room. "Mr. Vickram has invited me to sit in the dignitaries box with him for the ceremony today. Isn't that nice?"

(To be cont.)

That's it for today, but the next two chapters are written… just need some editing. (Would there happen to be anyone out there interested in Betaing? If so drop me a line.) I'd love to know your thoughts, the good, bad, and ugly, thanks!


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3:

As Katniss was pushed over to the line up of children at check-in by her mother, two officials passed by, carrying one of the large glass bowls. It was filled with slips of paper. Little death sentences waiting to be drawn. For the briefest of moments, Katniss actually considered being called a form of mercy. Her mother must have noticed her eyeing the bowl, because she leaned in close with a feral smirk on her lips and whispered,

"I wouldn't get your hopes up… he's had your name removed." And without a goodbye, she made her way towards the dignitary's box.

XXX

"PRIMROSE EVERDEEN!"

The air was ripped from Katniss' lungs when she heard Prim's name called out. From her peripheral vision she saw Iris drop to her knees. Trying to draw in a breath felt like a slow death. Before she realized what she was doing, her arms pushed through the lines of older girls, as she desperately sought out Prim. She could see Prim's stricken face blasted across all of the screens. In a moment she was there beside a trembling Prim, as tears poured down the little girls cheeks. Katniss pulled her into a desperate hug, as she dropped to her knees. Somewhere far away she heard a whistle blow, and she could see the Peacekeepers moving through the lines of children towards them from the large screens. Suddenly in that moment, all she could hear was her own heart as it pounded in her ear, while she clutched the sweet little girl before her. Katniss caught the satisfied leer as black eyes bored into her from the dignitary box, and suddenly the chaos of the moment was back upon her.

Vickram.

If he had the power to pull her name out, he certainly had the power to put names in. This was punishment for her disobedience. This was her fault. Prim's inevitable death would be her fault.

Like an electric jolt, it was suddenly all so clear. It didn't matter that her name wasn't in that bowl. They did it all the time in the other districts. Careers always did it.

Prim could go on and have a long life, and she could have a swift end to her own. Everyone could get exactly what they deserved.

If she was dead there would be no need to go after Prim. If she was dead, Prim would be safe. She may have never had any control in her life, but she could and most certainly would, have control in her death. How did they say it in those districts? As she remembered, the words tumbled out. Looking straight into the nearest camera, her voice panicked and raw she cried out,

"I VOLUNTEER!"

"Nooo!" Prim wailed, her little arms becoming a vice grip around Katniss's neck, choking her.

"It's going to be okay Prim. It's going to be okay. Shh, shh, It's fine, It's fine." Katniss whispered to the shaking girl, as she attempted in vain to pry the scrawny arms from around her.

Suddenly, Peeta was there, on his knees next to Katniss, attempting to pull Prim away. She could see from the screens that white clad peacekeepers were rushing towards the three, guns drawn. Kat swallowed hard, as she looked into the stormy blue eyes of Peeta Everdeen. For the very first time she saw what they looked like devoid of contempt.

"Kat…" His voice was hoarse as tears sprang to the corner of his eyes. Suddenly a horrifying thought washed over Katniss. If Vickram had rigged the girls' entries in a way to hurt her, he likely rigged the boys' entries as well.

"Peeta," She breathed, "You're going to be called too… I'm so so sorry." Tears were leaking down her face. Suddenly a peacekeeper had reached them.

Shock registered on his face, but she wasn't allowed to watch him process her words as she was forcefully turned towards the stage.

"A volunteer!" She could hear Effie Trinket's honey voice over the loud speaker, "How very novel for Twelve!" She held up her hands to show the crowd how to applaud, "Wonderful, just wonderful!"

Katniss' legs felt weighted as she stumbled towards the stage. Climbing the steps, she cringed at the sight of Effie Trinket. A think pink powder coated her face, and her lips were a sickly shade of lavender. She smiled wide, exposing yellowed teeth.

"Well, aren't you a pretty, young thing… what is your name, dear?" She placed a magenta gloved hand on Katniss' shoulder facing her towards the cameras.

"Katniss… Katniss Mellark." Her voice echoed off the buildings. Effie frowned. This girl didn't look like a career to her. Why on earth had she decided to volunteer for the little blonde runt? All of Panem would be wondering too. Perhaps being assigned to 12 wouldn't be nearly as awful as she thought. All would be a buzz about this turn of events.

"Well, then Katniss, let's see who will be joining you." She walked over to the Boy's bowl that was undoubted full of slips of paper with only Peeta's name. She searched the crowd, and found Peeta's deep blue eyes. He was standing next to Gale towards the back with the older boy's. Prim had been forced to return to her place in line.

"PEETA EVERDEEN."

Gale started to step forward, but Peeta shoved him back with a stern look.

"Take care of them." Peeta demanded. Gale nodded solemnly.

Making his way up to the stage, Effie beamed down at him.

"My, my… Two Everdeen's, in one day. What are the odds." Effie chirped.

Katniss' blood ran cold. There was no such thing as odds when everything was fixed. Reaching the stage, Peeta refused to look at Prim or his mother. As he reached Katniss, he saw that tears were still leaking from the corner of her eyes. In a quiet voice meant only for her ears, he whispered,

"Pull it together, look strong."

And thus, the District Twelve Tributes for the 74th annual hunger games were chosen.

XXX

In the Justice building, the families and close friends were allowed to say goodbye in the grand hall. It was private only in the sense that camera's where not allowed in.

"How did you know I was going to be called!" Peeta demanded of Katniss, the moment they were ushered into the building.

"Oh Peeta…" Her voice broke. His family and Gale were already sitting on a bench along the wall as they approached. "I'm… I'm to blame." Peeta was about to demand to know why when, out of know where, Arabella Mellark, yanked Katniss by her hair, and smacked her across the face with a closed fist.

"You _stupid_ girl! He'll kill us for this!" The sharp sound of the smack echoed through the great hall of the justice building. In an instant both Gale and Peeta were pulling Mrs. Mellark away from Katniss. "Unhand me you trash!" Her voice was venom as she ripped her hands from their grasp.

A sudden sharp snap of fingers behind them drew their attention as a group of peace keepers rushed forward and forced both Peeta and Gale to their knees. Mrs. Everdeen pulled Prim close, as one of them targeted the point of his gun at Iris's heart.

Flanked by Vickram, in one step he clasped a hand around Katniss' neck slamming her into the wall. The back of her head smacked the marble with a sharp crack.

"I WILL make sure you live through this! You do not get to choose when you die. I DO." He bellowed into her face, his own was red with rage as spit covered his lips, and his temples bulged. "You WILL be my wife." His hand around her throat trembled in fury, as Katniss struggled to breath. "SAY IT!" Katniss' eyes grew wide with terror as she went still, refusing to give in. With his free hand, he pulled out an ancient silver revolver from inside his jacket, and pointed it at Prim, "Say it or I kill her." Iris' scream echoed to the rafters as she clutched her daughter close. Peeta, crazed with fear, started to struggle wildly against the Peace Keepers restraining him, causing them to force him all the way to the ground, one placing a boot on his neck as the side of his face hit the marble floor.

"I will!" Katniss shrieked, as tears poured down her face. Vickram, not convinced cocked his gun, "Please, Please don't," She begged, "I will be your wife, I will be your wife. PLEASE, please don't. Please. I'll do whatever you want. Please. PLEASE!"

"That sounds better." He lowered his gun and released his hold on her neck to reveal a purple handprint. Stepping over to Peeta, the boot was removed from Peeta's neck as he was hauled into an upright position on his knees.

"You! You _will_ make sure she returns. Or they both die." Vickram hissed as he pointed to his mother and sister. "Do you understand."

"Yes." Peeta responded, his voice strong and eyes black with a feral hate.

The sound of a throat being cleared drew their attention to the left. Haymitch Abernathy and a frightened Effie Trinket stood waiting with the Official Capitol Peace Keepers. It was time to go.

Shooting Katniss a loath filled glare, he stalked from the building, followed by the District 12 Peace Keepers.

There was no time for goodbyes, as both Peeta and Katniss were grabbed by the new set of Peace Keepers and pulled towards the exit. Peeta managed to reach between two peacekeepers and stroked Prim's tear streaked cheek. She reached out after him, but their hands missed.

"Everything is going to be fine, Prim." He lied. As he passed Gale, he saw the deep dark resolution in his friend's eyes.

"I will take care of them." Gale's voice was strong as stone as his fists clenched at his side. Peeta opened his mouth to respond, but suddenly the less chipper, but no less shrill voice of Effie Trinket announced,

"We have a schedule to keep, escort them to their compartments… good gracious, their prep team is going to have their work cut out. Would you just look at those bruises! They look like savages!" She was nearly wailing.

Katniss looked back over her shoulder to spot her mother, but Arabella was gone. Taking one last look at Prim, the little girl mouthed, "I love you."

Haymitch moved forward and started to talk quickly with Gale. He made the number three with his fingers, and Gale nodded again. Casting a glance towards the door, Gale locked eyes with Katniss for only a moment before she was pushed forward out into the blinding mid-day sun.

XXX

Katniss couldn't bring herself to meet Peeta's eyes as he entered the dining car. Her own were still red and blurry as the tears refused to stop. Sitting across from her, Haymitch sipped straight from the bottle, as he stared off into nothingness. Effie, glanced up, but returned almost at once to her clipboard.

Slumping into the chair next to Katniss, Peeta turned to face her.

"We _have_ to get you home," there was such a raw conviction in his voice that they all turned to look at him. After taking another large gulp, Haymitch set his bottle down on the glass-topped table hard.

"Fucking, Vickram," he growled between gritted teeth.

"You know, I bet your name hasn't been in that bowl since Vikram came to our fuck-forsaken district." He ran a shaky hand through his wild hair, "I'm just surprised as hell, that your disgusting mother had the decency to make him wait until you were 17."

Katniss shuddered as a new wave of tears rose to the surface. She swallowed them down like bile.

"When did he approach you?" Peeta demanded.

"This morning." Katniss replied, her voice hoarse, and small.

"And you refused him?" Peeta asked trying to understand what had happened.

"I tried," Katniss swallowed hard, "And then he threatened to hurt…" She swallowed hard again, unable to finish the sentence.

"I assume your mother set this up?" Haymitch asked from across the table. She nodded, once again looking anywhere but in someone's eyes. "For fuck's sake!" Haymitch swore, "What kind of a woman whore's out their own daughter."

"Arranged marriages are very popular in the Capitol," Effie chimed in, only to be rewarded with three sets of glaring eyes. "Well, they are." A tense silence pervaded the room as attendants served the dinner. The only one to raise a fork after their departure was Effie.

"Peeta," Katniss finally turned to him, "I'm so so sorr…"

"Don't," Peeta held his hand up to stop her, "Just don't." And with that, the conversation for the evening was over.

XXXX

As Effie predicted, District Twelve was the talk of the evening as commentators with atrocious accents speculated on the nature of three kids' connections. Both Katniss and Peeta stared off into different corners through the whole mandatory broadcast. Just as it was about to end, the train stopped to refuel.

By the time they started again, the broadcast was finally over. An attendant entered, as Effie let out a huge yawn.

"Miss Mellark? A package was waiting for you at the fuel station. I've had it placed in your room. It arrived by transport shortly before us, I believe it was urgent." Katniss nodded numbly, as she stood to retire to her compartment. Haymitch and Peeta followed a moment later.

Peeta leaned against the door to his compartment once it was shut behind him. Letting out a shuddering breath, he looked about his shiny room. Suddenly, from down the corridor the piercing shrieking of Katniss could be heard. Nearly tearing the door of its hinges he ran towards the gut wrenching sound. The door was locked when he reached it. Rattling on it fervently, he tried to pry it open, while her screams echoed down the corridor. The noise was raw and wounded as it turned into hopeless sobs. He pounded on the door.

"Katniss! Katniss!"

Flanked by two rushing attendants, Haymitch appeared down the hall as Peeta threw his shoulder into the door. Suddenly all was quiet from inside the compartment. "Katniss!" His panic was palpable.

Finally, stepping back, Peeta kicked the door with all his might. The lock finally broke and the door slammed open hitting the wall behind it.

Katniss was huddled in the corner on the floor shaking, hiding her face in her hands. Peeta stepped into the room and saw a note and a jewelry box on the built in vanity.

He picked up the note, his heart frozen with dread,

_A token from your district to take with you into the arena. –Paasch_

Picking up the box with trembling hands, Peeta flipped it open. Inside on a silk pillow was a small, severed finger, the blood starting to brown at the base, soot caked under the little pink nail.

He knew it was hers.

Closing the box, Peeta suddenly punched the mirror of the vanity so hard he put a hole in the wall behind it as thousands of glass shards shattered, littering the vanity top like glitter. His furry was then released in a deep, guttural noise that shook his whole body.

Haymitch slid in behind Peeta and scooped the limp shaking form of Katniss up, carrying her away from the room and letting the door close behind him.

XXX

The next morning the train picked up speed on the long stretch towards the Capitol. In car D15 an attendant finally opened the door to Katniss' compartment. Peeta was huddled on the floor in a restless sleep; the room around him completely destroyed, his cheeks were caked with dried streaks of tears and blood.

(To be cont.)

(Thoughts?)


	4. Chapter 4

Thanks guys for the comments, any sort of feedback is always appreciated! A special thanks to Keylana for the pm… just made my whole day!

It was either two shorter chapters…. Or one ridiculously long one… I opted for two short… don't hate me.

Chapter 4:

"Where is it?" A freshly showered Peeta demanded of Katniss as he burst into the dining car. She had been sitting alone at the table, pushing a grape around her plate with her fork, when she was startled out of her thoughts. Glancing up suddenly, she shuddered as she realized what he was referring to.

"I… I…" she stammered, "I had the attendant… put it on ice." Her voice was small, but seemed to echo in the empty car. Peeta's dark eyes narrowed in on her.

"Why!" He demanded, his tone incredulous. Katniss opened her mouth to respond, slowly shaking her head from side to side as tears sprang to her tired eyes.

"I… I don't know, Peeta." She looked down at her plate. As an afterthought she whispered, "It's what your mother always did."

Peeta balked at this. She was right, of course. Despite the fact that there was never any hope of rescuing a lost appendage with their feeble medical means, his mother had always attempted to preserve the limb on ice. At one time their ice-box had been full of frozen fingers and toes. Why she did it, he still couldn't say. Perhaps she did it for no other reason than to give the patient hope… as false and ill thought out as that might be.

He let out a long breath, like the hiss of a teakettle, and fell into a chair at the other end of the table.

"There's no point. It can't be saved,." his voice was hollow, and his sadness raw.

"I know." A kamikaze tear slipped from her watered eyes, and raced down her cheek and off her chin. She wiped away its trail hastily.

Her prolonged sorrow for Prim had been simmering all through the sleepless night. Her heart ached. Her head felt numb, like it had been washed with Novocain, making her thoughts hazy.

"Let's… let's just try to put it from our minds." Peeta sighed placing his head in his hands. Katniss jerked her head up at this. Not because it was the most ridiculous suggestion she had ever heard, but because it was one she had heard many a time. Hearing it from his lips made her heart hurt tremendously. He sounded just like his mother and sister. They were both always saying that. Always. _Just put it from your mind._

"If only it were that easy," she scowled.

The door to the car opened, and a livid Effie, blazed into the room in a god awful puffy peach dress.

"Peeta!" She shrieked in her thick Capitol accent, "What is wrong with you!" She slapped her coral clutch down on the table, making the dishes clank, "What could have possibly possessed you to destroy that room! That was a mahogany credenza! It's all ruined, just ruined! You trashed it! How could you!" Her voice climbed to higher octaves until it was nearly shrill. "Just because you are from a savage district does NOT mean you have to act like a savage! I can't even look at you! How am I supposed to explain this! Your abhorrent behavior reflects on all of us and…"

Suddenly Peeta stood picking up two pastries and an apple with his napkin. He strode down the length of the table away from the gawking parrot, and towards Katniss. She swallowed as he approached her.

"Just where do you think you are going! Peeta, you come back here this instant! You are being unforgivably rude!"

"Would you like to eat with me in my compartment?" His question wasn't necessarily in an inviting tone, but Katniss was willing to take any kindness she could at that moment. She nodded, as her breath hitched.

Without a backwards glance, he went through the door behind her towards his compartment. Unsure if she was supposed to follow, she looked back at a fuming Effie.

"Katniss, don't you dare! We are suppose to be going over your schedule for the day and…" Effie stopped midsentence as Katniss rose from the table. She plucked up a couple muffins, and followed Peeta.

XXX

As she opened the door to the next car, she was surprised to see Peeta leaning against the wall waiting for her. It was such a polite thing to do.

"That woman is insufferable," his tone was tired, as his shoulders slumped in.

"She doesn't understand… you know… why you did it," Katniss hedged.

"No, and she doesn't need to. I'm more than fine with her thinking me a savage."

"She thinks all of 12 are savages… so try not to take it personally," Katniss managed a weak smile to accompany her dryness. She looked down the long hall where the room in question was located.

"This one is me," Peeta motioned across from him, and stepped forward to open the compartment. It looked quite similar to Katniss', though of course still fully intact.

"I'm sorry I destroyed your room," Peeta sighed, "Where did you end up sleeping?"

"Oh… with Haymitch." Peeta turned at once to look down at her, eyes wide with surprise, "I mean, in his room… in his bed…" Peeta's eyes went wider, "Wait, no, I mean… I didn't really sleep…" That sounded worse. " Haymitch's compartment had a couch, he drank a bottle of the dark stuff, and passed out. He gave me the bed… but… I didn't really sleep because my mind wouldn't turn off, and…" She stopped when she saw the half smile resting on Peeta's lips, his blue eyes, almost smiling too. She couldn't help the blush that rose to her cheeks.

She understood it. Why all the girls at school whispered about him. Why they always said "Hi" to him in the halls, and then giggled into their books obnoxiously. He was an attractive young man. Especially when he smiled. The corners of his eyes crinkled up, and he had such straight white teeth. His strong jaw, he shared with his father, as well as his tanned complexion, but his hair and eyes where all his mother. They were unrealistically blue. It felt good to finally receive a genuine smile from him.

Katniss walked further into his room, and only when she caught her reflection in his vanity mirror did she realize that she was still wearing her robe. It was a silky cornflower blue that off set her hair, and made her waist appear impossibly thin at the belt. The lace of the matching light blue camisole underneath was peeking out. She set the muffins down, and pulled it closed more tightly around her.

"Pastry?" He offered, shuffling awkwardly.

"Hmm? Oh… no thank you." She glanced about the room, avoiding his eyes. It had seemed like a good idea at the time, to escape Effie's tirade, but now that they were alone in his room, it was ridiculously uncomfortable. She shuffled over to the bedside table, pretending to inspect the shiny objects that had been perfectly placed about the room.

"It looks just like mine." She offered lamely, her inspection complete. "Or… well, did." She bit her lip at how awful that sounded.

"Perhaps we should make them match? You know, for continuity's sake." She had to look at him to see if he was being serious. The smile in his eyes betrayed him.

"Okay…" Katniss feigned indifference, and she reached out her index finger and tipped the small glass clock off the bedside table. It didn't break as the floor was carpeted, but it did land quiet unceremoniously in front of the bathroom door. She darted her eyes up to him, unsure of what she would find there. He quirked his head at her, confused.

"Well you destroyed my room, don't I get to destroy yours now?"

Katniss wasn't accustomed to flirting, but she was quite certain that her tone suggested otherwise. Peeta must have thought similarly, because his brows rose in surprise. As it happened, Peeta was quite familiar with flirting, and responded in kind,

"I don't know Katniss… I don't think you're quite savage enough." Her mouth dropped slightly open at this, as amusement lighted her eyes at his challenge.

They both understood what was happening. They were both aware enough of themselves and of each other to understand that they were playing a delicate farcical game of misdirection. They were both more than willing to entertain any other thoughts beyond the dire realities of their current situation.

She reached up and tapped the back of the lamp, so that it titled forward, teetering on the edge of the bedside table. She shot Peeta a challenging look, and in return he rolled his eyes as if to say, "Please, that's child's play… did you see your room?"

She let her hand drop, and so did the lamp… that is until the loose slack in the cord caught, and it was ripped from the wall, the light bulb letting off a loud pop and spark as it burned out.

Katniss jumped at the noise, and Peeta actually laughed at her.

She shot him an incredulous look before she yanked the comforter off the bed and on to the ground. Climbing up on top of the mattress, she fisted the curtains by the window and ripped them from their rod. She threw them as hard as she could towards the bathroom door. Unfortunately, being sheer, they didn't exactly have the desired effect as they delicately floated to the ground.

Peeta laughed at this too, and Katniss blushed in embarrassment that they didn't at least hit the wall. In retaliation for his laughter, she took the glass on the bedside table, and threw it against the Mirror.

"Oh, shit!" Peeta ducked as glass broke everywhere. This seemed to have the desired effect. Peeta looked up at her as though she were crazy, but she saw the awe that rimmed his stare. He hadn't expected her to do that and for some reason she would certainly dissect later, she relished it.

"That felt good." Katniss breathed. Peeta finally graced her with another genuine smile, and her breath caught at how stunning it was. Not wanting to lose the momentum of the moment she flung a pillow at Peeta, who caught it easily,

"Hey!" He exclaimed as she picked up the other one and tried to rip it open.

"Katniss," Peeta reached out a hand to stop her, but she jumped back further on the bed out of his reach. Seeing the screw from the curtain rod exposed, she hooked the fabric of the pillowcase on it, and jerked with all her might. The fabric finally ripped, and white feathers exploded out of the casing, covering the small compartment in downy white. Peeta spit out a feather and looked at her. Grabbing another pillow off the bed, she held her chin a little higher, matching his even gaze in defiance.

"Don't," Peeta warned as she hooked the second pillow's case on the screw. There was a slight flicker in his eye, as he wondered if she would really do it. He was answered quickly when she yanked down hard on the pillow, and a second storm of feathers erupted into the room.

"That's it!" Peeta replied laughing as he climbed up onto the bed after her, his voice both a mixture of annoyance and amusement… usually reserved for Prim. She jumped to the sofa, still clutching the empty pillow casing, and let out a small squeal. He lunged after her, but she jumped out of the way, running into the dresser hard, the contents on top rattling as they toppled over on the ground. He advanced on her unit she clutched her arm to her chest.

"Ow!" She sucked in her breath through clenched teeth.

"What! What happened?" It was no wonder she cut herself what with all the broken glass littered about. "Here, let me see," Peeta offered, climbing off the couch towards her. With cat like reflexes Katniss snatched the pillow from his hand, and jumped back behind him onto the bed.

"Gotch ya!" He reached out and grabbed her foot and they both toppled onto the bed with an 'umph' as a cloud of feathers puffed up around them.

"Are you alright?" Peeta asked propping up on his elbow, a smile gracing his lips.

"Yeah..." She turned her head to look up at him, through the floating feathers, returning his smile.

They both stared into each other's eyes as the feathers settled, both unsure of what to say or do. Both not wanting to leave the lightness of the moment.

Their dark reality lurked on the edges of their minds, pacing and waiting for a way back in, but for the moment, they had grasped at an opportunity to smile, a last opportunity to be children. Both clutched at it, unwilling to give it up.

It wasn't until Haymitch pounded on the door that the moment snapped, the bubble burst, and they were forced back in to the cruel truth of their lives.

XXX

To Be Cont.

I just had to write something sweet after the intensity of that last chapter. May seem out of place… but it is what it is. I'd love to know your thoughts on the matter….


	5. Chapter 5

I wrote this chapter three times, and finally settled on this. It opens as a journal entry by Peeta prior to the opening ceremonies…

Chapter 5:

"_The Capitol is little more than an ageless mask. It's perfectly crafted, timeworn, and shellacked with layers upon layers of brightly tinted veneer. I never imagined it could be possible to hate a place this much. _

_The city screams distraction. _

_The rainbow painted streets, the bright blinking lights, screens blasting coverage at every corner. And the people! They are all unrecognizable as humans. Masked. Anything and everything that made them, them, has been plumped and plucked and painted, and adorned. Walking distractions. _

_It's all expertly designed to steal your attention, to grasp and squeeze it so hard that no other thought can enter your mind. If you're smiling at Caesar, you can't notice the barren gazes of those silly unfortunate fools that haunt the outer districts. How anyone can grow up here and not realize the truth of their meaningless and pathetic candy coated lives is beyond me. To live your life and never once stare down the barrel of what it really means to exist as yourself is not a life worth living. I may have grown up dirt poor in the barest of all the districts but at least I know who I am. _

_No treasure, no life of ease, and not even an honest sense of security could ever persuade me to trade that away. These wretched people are hollow and vapid. They babble on about the death of children in such a detached and demoralized way, and even after, they have the audacity to call us savages. _

_One of the guys on my prep team this morning referred to the old rebellion as our "grandfather's folly". It took everything within me not to rip the scissors from his grasp and plunge them deep into his larynx. To describe the misfortune of generations upon generations of men and women… humans, in such a cavalier way. The word itself draws up images of bumbling district folk throwing their butter knives at sparkling Capitol hovercrafts. Perhaps that is how the capitol rewrote the history here. They really believe we are fools who deserve this._

_Don't they think! If that is really, truly what they thought the old rebellion was… then how can they not question the ongoing severity of the punishment for a simple "folly". How has the Capitol managed to brainwash them all in such a way that they can overlook both the threat that the districts once posed to them and could pose to them again; as well as the devastation by the Capitol's response to a simple " folly". _

_And the way he said it. His condescending tone. Disdain dripping from his mouth in reference to brave men he never even knew. People whose only crime was a deep rooted belief that they deserved to walk the earth as free men. To find that notion so repulsive that is justifies the ongoing oppression of their children's great grand children. I'm disgusted. _

_I know the survival of my family depends upon Katniss coming home, and that our chances are best if we can pander to the crowd to get sponsors… but I don't think I can do that. In fact I know I can't. As I approach my impending death… as each day dwindles nearer to my last, I am overwhelmed with an urgency to live each moment true to myself. _

_I don't want to hurt the people from those other districts… I want to hurt the Capitol._

_And above all… I no longer have the strength or desire to deny myself any longer of the one thing I've always wanted… but would never admit to in the light of day. I'm going to…" _Peeta swallowed hard as his pen hesitated over the word, _ "…die.. soon, and I'd rather not have any regrets about it."_ Her grey eyes were at once recalled to his mind. He squeezed his eyes shut, willing his subconscious to tattoo the image of them across his soul.

Suddenly there was a gruff pounding at his door,

"Peeta? You ready? Portia wants to see you before you head down for line up? " Haymitch's words lacked their usual slur. It was still early though. Peeta was certain that when he opened the door, a familiar glass tumbler would be clutched in his mentor's hand. Likely a whisky neat, if he had to guess.

Peeta released a long breath, looking down at his scrawl upon the paper.

"Yeah, be right out…" He yelled towards the door. Glancing at himself in the mirror he took in his costume and make up for the opening ceremonies, shifting his jaw from side to side.

He was glad when the only makeup Portia had put on him was simple bronzer. It highlighted the contours of his face, making his features look sharper and raw with a distinct "Don't fuck with this guy" air. After hating nearly everything he had come into contact with since being in the Capitol city, Portia was a breath of chemical free air. He didn't know what it was about her, but there was something in her eyes that told him without words that she… understood? Unlikely…but still, he couldn't shake the feeling that his stylist had the countenance of someone who 'was in on it'. Her eyes, unlike her Capitol counterparts, glowed with emotional intelligence. She didn't bother him with trivial questions, or the assumption that he should be just thrilled and honored to be in the Capitol. 

He looked at the black suit she created him. He had only ever seen blackness like this in the deepest bowels of the mines during power outages. It was an unnerving blackness, like being sucked into an abyss. Peeta marveled at how a simple fabric could evoke such strong emotion. It made him feel powerful wearing it, and that's more than he could have asked for. Portia had somehow understood this. He made a mental note to thank her for it, as he picked up the sheet of paper, and dropped it into the fire place across the room. The flames licked at the edges of it, before a red finger poked through the middle of the page, browning and blackening his messy script. They consumed the paper fully until the pop sound of a stray spark seemed to signal its finality.

XXXXX

A sharp pang in Peeta's heart stole the breath from his lungs the moment his eyes landed on Katniss in her canary yellow gown.

From across the gilded atrium, she appeared with her team behind her. Cinna attempted to mask his satisfied smirk, but it proved resilient as it danced in his gold rimmed eyes. He walked around Katniss, surveying her as though she were his greatest accomplishment, straightening her gown here and there. Placing his hands on her shoulders, Peeta watched as he leaned in and whispered something to Katniss. She nodded in return and then began the long trek across the atrium to the number 12 chariot.

She looked like a fantasy come real.

The gown he designed was incredible. She was an enduring vision. Slowly the whole atrium went quiet as people paused to stare. The noise continued to die away, conversations halted until the only sound ringing out to the rafters, was the staccato of her stilettos across the glitter encrusted pavement.

She was grace draped in yellow, like a well-dressed sunrise or an ancient goddess from those glory filled antiquated times.

Her small frame was perfectly accentuated by the golden yellow corset top of her gown. Yellow crystals adorned the boning of the corset and glinted brilliantly in the stadium lighting. The skirt was covered in fluffy yellow ostrich feathers, that made each movement look airy, and effortless. The skirt of the gown was cut to mid thigh in the front, exposing her long, recently bronzed legs. But behind her, an incredible train flowed out trailing nearly eight feet. It half dragged, half floated across the floor. It too, was covered in the wispy ostrich feathers, and billowed as she walked beckoning eyes towards her.

But the most remarkable part of the gown, was the massive golden yellow wings that sprouted from her back. They looked like a bird taking off in flight, and spanned high above her in a majestic soaring arch. Yellow jewels were pinned into her intricate braided up-do, and an emerald cut yellow-diamond the size of a walnut hung just above the arches of her pushed up bust. It glinted in the light like a honing beacon.

Her skin glowed, casting an otherworldly look about her, like she was immortal. Peeta found himself suddenly wondering if she was.

The whole dress was in constant movement, and demanded attention. No one would ever forget who she was after that night. It was the kind of epic costume that would go down in game history lore. She would be a legend forever because of that gown.

It was certainly a broad interpretation of the little mine companion, but once again, Peeta was shocked by the deep conviction brimming from the eyes of their Stylists. Though he had only met him briefly, Cinna, like Portia, had glowed with a sense of elevated understanding. Somehow he had brilliantly captured the essence of what the canary meant to the miners. It was true that they used the little birds as an early warning system of dangerous gasses as the birds would stop their gentle twittering when they sensed the air growing toxic. But to Peeta at least, their presence in the depths of the mine meant so much more. It was dark and gritty and suffocating down, so deep within the earth. The narrow passages and stale air pervaded a sense of hopelessness. But the little yellow bird with it's sweet voice, called out a constant reminder that the world at large existed just above. That life in the mines wasn't all there was. To see something so bright and soft and delicate against a backdrop of jagged rocks and darkness sparked inklings of hope. Even the gruffest of seasoned miners couldn't pass the Canary cage without offering the little bird a friendly whistle. Somehow, Cinna saw this.

Peeta, though looking charming in his smartly tailored black suit, would undoubtedly go unnoticed that evening. The other tributes stared daggers at Katniss' back as she glided passed them. The girl tribute from one, turned to whisper some sort of hateful comment to her stylist, pointing at Katniss.

The boy from two stepped out from around his chariot to get a better view. His eyes followed her in a menacing way, while a leer stretched across his face as he ogled her. Peeta instantly heated as he surveyed they way he eyed her legs, the tribute's leer growing wider.

Not wanting to be caught ogling her himself, Peeta shifted his eyes to the floor, to the wall, anywhere but at her, as he walked forward to meet her. His heart pounded against his ribs as she approached, as he found himself suddenly nervous at what he should say.

"Wow." Was all he could breath out as he finally returned his gaze to meet her own. Her deep gray eyes were filled with trepidation.

"Everyone is staring at me." Katniss cast a sideways glance about the room.

"That is the point." Peeta managed a small smile that seemed to go unnoticed, "You look… incredible." Katniss's eyes snapped to his at his honest tone. He reached up and rubbed the back of his neck, suddenly feeling vulnerable under her piercing gaze, he changed the subject quickly, "Is it heavy?"

"What..?" Katniss mumbled still reeling from his compliment. Suddenly her brain snapped to the present as she registered his question, "No, not at all!" She demonstrated by reaching back and fluffing the train out, it floated up effortlessly behind her, billowing back down the way a feather would, "Cinna is brilliant. I mean look at this," her hands reached up and gently grazed over her ribcage as she touched the small jewels sown in an intricate pattern down her torso. Peeta's jaw clenched involuntarily, as his cheeks heated. "It's so beautiful… I just… I feel so… so…" Her eyes went up as she searched for the word.

"In control?" Peeta offered, his gaze intense.

"Yes." Katniss breathed as realized that it was true.

"It's a pretty illusion." Peeta smiled sadly.

"It was kind of them to try and make us feel this way." Katniss offered as she looked back down fingering one of the crystals that was caught in the light in such a way to cast little specks of rainbows across the space between them.

Peeta nodded. There was something in their Stylists actions that suggested they truly cared. Perhaps that was nothing more than a pretty illusion as well.

A low whistle from their left seized their attention. Haymitch approached, his eyes slightly glassed over from his fully-grown buzz,

"Well aren't you just the prettiest lil' Canary," He slurred. There was a hint of mockery in his voice, and Peeta watched Katniss fidget under their mentor's harsh gaze. Her confidence from the moment before dwindling with each step he took towards them.

"Don't be a Dick, Haymitch." Peeta snapped, overwhelmed by the desire to reach out and touch Katniss's shoulder. His hand twitched, but he kept it at his side. Haymitch waved him off in dismissal.

"I'm only paying a compliment, boy." There was a glower in his voice, and Peeta wanted to punch him for his patronizing tone.

"OHH, OH, OHHHHH Katniss!" Effie breathed as she clasped her hands to her heart, her eyes glassing over. "You look stunning! Just… oh, stunning," Cinna and Portia approached with a starry eyed Effie, the rest of their vapid team following behind. "Oh Cinna… you're truly an artist!" She mumbled as she walked around Katniss eyeing the gown in wonder. "Katniss, you are easily the most beautiful girl in all of Panem tonight." Peeta looked down at her and swallowed hard. Katniss cheeks were tinted pink from the attention, and she kept darting her eyes to the floor as her insecurities flared at their flattery.

A voice over the loud speaker announced the final call for formation, and requested that mentors, chaperones, and stylists take their seats. The atrium started to empty of people, as they headed for the side door to the left of the massive floor to ceiling iron curtains. As the side door opened, they caught a blast of noise as the crowd beyond thundered. It instantly drew their attention, and Katniss' heart lurched to the bottom of her stomach.

"Listen up," Cinna spoke directly to Peeta and Katniss, huddling in, "Look straight ahead, and ignore the crowd. You'll grab their attention more if you refuse to pander to them. It will shroud you two in mystery and they are already so curious about you. If you pay attention to anything, only pay attention to each other. Don't wave. Don't smile. When they call your names refuse to look. Hold your heads high, and if you can, mask your face in a sort of knowing smirk. We want to create the idea that you are untouchable, that you are unafraid, and that you are invincible."

"Such lovely words." Haymitch's tone dripped with sarcasm and bitterness. "Like that dress isn't pandering to them!"

"The gown is stunning, and someone has to help them get sponsors." Cinna bit back, "Why don't you take your seat, Abernathy." Cinna's voice left no room for discussion. Haymitch threw up his hands walking away, muttering and cussing under his breath. Turning back to his tributes, Cinna placed a hand on each of their shoulders, his eyes brimming with fierce emotion as he leaned in close and said,

"You may not be able to control the situations you find yourself in, but you control your reactions to them. It may not seem like it now, but you are the Victors of your own destiny. Don't ever let _them_ forget it." With a squeeze to Peeta's shoulder and kiss to Katniss' cheek, he followed his team over to the side door, as the first chariot slipped through the narrow way of the curtain.

Peeta held out his hand to help Katniss step up into the chariot, his heart jumping as their palms connected. She broke the contact and looked away. The stood silently and waited. They could hear Caesar's voice over the loudspeaker, barely audible over the roar of the Capitol crowd.

As expected districts one and two received thunderous applause. The tributes from eight must have done something worth while, because there was a flare up in applause for them. As they inched closer to the curtain opening, Katniss grew increasingly more terrified. She glanced at Peeta to see if he was in a similar state and was shocked to see a resolute calmness radiating off of him.

District eleven's chariot slipped out from the curtain, and as they pulled forward up to the opening Katniss leaned over to Peeta, drawing his attention,

"You look handsome…" Without missing a beat Peeta turned his face, so that they were inches apart and responded instantly with an honest admission,

"You're gorgeous."

He wasn't flirting. No coy smile accompanied his words. They were just as intense as his eyes, and a chill ran down her spine, as her cheeks heated into a brilliant blush. He held her gaze, his eyes burning into her.

Her heart pounded against her rib cage as she bravely continued to stare into his bright blue eyes. Peeta reeled at the look on her face. It wasn't the shy smile she had given Gale. Her eyes were dark, brimming with intensity as she let out a jagged breath. Neither broke their eye contact as they were given the go ahead.

"Cinna suggested that we hold hands." Katniss finally broke the trance. Peeta looked thoughtful for a moment as he wondered if that was what had been whispered to her earlier. She held her breath as he paused. Finally, he held his hand out to her, as their chariot began its trek down the lane. Katniss swallowed and placed her hand in his, her heart drumming a song inside her chest.

XXX

Katniss' train floated out behind them as if it were a war banner. There was an audible gasp as the whole crowd became deathly still and seemed to suck in one collective breath all at once. Three seconds of stunned silence passed before the crowd absolutely lost their minds.

(To Be Cont.)

As always, I'd love to know your thoughts. Thanks!


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6:

"Katniss, you… you can't wear that." Cinna sighed, his voice exhausted as he held up the _gift_. This one had an accompanying note as well,

_Wear this to the Sponsor's Ball. – Paasch_

As the Sponsor's ball was never televised, Katniss had no idea of knowing that this was an annual event that took place after the opening ceremonies. The tributes were granted the great honor of meeting President Snow, and enlisting audiences with the _annual_ sponsors. The elite of Panem, who always supplemented their government's ensuing bankruptcy by paying trillions towards the games, got to meet the unfortunates destined to the arena. Cinna looked at the hideous gown, a permanent frown fixed upon his face. He had prepared a lovely light pink number for Katniss to change into after the opening ceremonies. But it appeared her betrothed had other ideas. He threw the dress down on the bed, unwilling to old it any longer. His disgust was evident, and Katniss reached up to rub her temple, her shoulders shrunken in.

"Cinna, You don't know what he'll do if I disobey… I have to." She breathed.

"It's just not right, Katniss." Cinna replied, his tone forlorn.

"I know… but I don't have a choice." Katniss replied, taking the monstrosity up from the bed. He shook his head from side to side, feeling dejected on behalf of his lovely tribute. No one should have to endure something like this.

"We all have a choice Katniss." His voice was quiet and laced with disappointment. He left the room, unable to witness the act of the young girl donning such a horrific garment.

XXXX

"We're is Katniss?" Peeta asked Haymitch as he surveyed the crowded ballroom.

"Cinna said she's coming." Haymitch offered just before throwing back a deep amber colored liquid, handing Peeta a twin of the drink he just downed. "Drink this… it will help you survive the evening."

And with that Haymitch disappeared into the throng of flamboyantly dressed people. Peeta looked down at the amber liquid curiously. There was a hefty weight to the glass, he wondered if it was crystal.

Glancing about at the gilded ballroom, Peeta glowered at the scene before him. The hall was magnificent in size and adornment. Avox waiter's dressed in black passed trays heaped with hors d'ouerves about the room. Capitolites stuffed their brightly painted lips with fruit, talking with their mouths full, and laughing easily at the merriment of the evening. He frowned at the other tribute's smiling faces, a distinct urge to vomit imposing upon him. To be forced to prostrate before the Capitol Elite was utterly cruel. He watched as a blue haired and balding Capitolite ran his fingers down the shoulder of a pretty tribute from six. She laughed hollowly at his attempts to ensnare. It was all quite disgusting. That's what it took to survive in the arena. Giving your all to powerful Capitolites with the hopes that matches, medicine or bread would find their way to you in the arena.

Searching the crowd for lovely gray eyes, he came up empty. Katniss had not yet arrived. To his left an older Capitolite woman with fuchsia hair approached. She was dripping in jewels.

"Peeta, isn't it?" She twittered, her smile wickedly lascivious. Two of her companions flanked her, eyeing him as though he was a deliciously decorated cupcake.

"Um, yeah." He replied, finally biting the bullet, and throwing back the amber liquid. It was acid down his throat, burning as he swallowed. His eyes watered but he managed not to cough.

"So Dear… we just have got to know…" The woman in brilliant dark pink hedged, "What is the going on with you and the girl tribute from your district." Her voice sounded like a low purr, urging him to spill his guts at its low hum.

"No…Nothing." Peeta stammered.

"Oh Please Peeta dear… there is something going on! Volunteering for your sister.. the hand holding… the way you look at her…. I mean… It's just so… so very…" She sighed with her friends as she contemplated their imaginary relationship. "You can not tell me nothing is going on…" She gave him a knowing smirk that made him hate himself.

"Excuse me." He nodded to the ladies coldly, before hastily retreating towards the far wall where he spotted Cinna and Portia. Shaking out his hands as he went, forcing their mocking gaze from his mind.

XXXX

"How are you holding up?" Portia asked, handing him glass, this one filled with a neon blue liquid.

"I hate this… I won't do it. I'm dead anyway." Peeta replied dejectedly before throwing back the drink Portia offered. He assumed it wasn't a 'sipping' sort of drink, and was pleasantly surprised at the sweet taste as it slipped down his throat.

"Everything is going to be okay, Peeta." Portia offered, placing a small palm on his shoulder. But the lost stare in her eyes betrayed her words. Nothing would be all right ever again. Those days were long gone.

"Fucking Capitolite women!" Haymitch suddenly appeared his brow downcast spit flying along with his curse words. "They fucking just throw themselves at you… what ever happened to decency! It wasn't like this when I was a tribute!" He sputtered. "Old fucking hags!" Cinna and Portia shared a knowing glance as they smirked at the mentor's misfortune.

Suddenly, the doors at the top of the grand staircase opened, and all eyes were drawn to the stunning form entering.

Katniss stood at the top of the stair dressed in a revealing and draping gown. Again a gasp resounded around the room before the complimented Capitolites began to applaud at her choice of gown.

It was Grecian in style, with a halter that wrapped up around her neck and fell in drapes around her feminine form. But what drew the Capitolites attention was the insignia inlaid into the fabric of the silk gown. The Capitol flag, in all it's putrid glory was wrapped around her like a death shroud.

Peeta wasn't sure if it was the consumed alcohol or the gown, but a sudden urge to vomit was swift as it overtook him. The only thing that kept him from running to the bathrooms was the recognition of the man next to her. Paasch Vikram towered over her, his hand firmly grasped at her elbow, his dark eyes alight with heartless pride at his darling bride.

Rage Peeta had never known ignited his body as the glass slipped from his hand, shattering upon the marble floor. Suddenly everything sounded as though it was underwater. Everything that is, except his violent heartbeat that pounded in his ear. A prominent beat that shook his soul. He heard the muffled voice of Haymitch,

"Get him OUT OF HERE!" It sounded so loud, and yet so very far away. Suddenly multiple hands where upon him. Clawing and pulling as they pushed and prodded him towards a door to the side of the ballroom.

His mind was blank, except for two resounding thoughts. One of Prim's little detached finger upon a bed of silk, and two, of Paasch Vickram's grasp on Katniss' arm.

He never thought he was capable of murder, but in that moment his heart sang a song of hate that enflamed him until he was fully consumed. A furry unknown held his hand tightly as he was forced from the room.

XXXX

Katniss shuddered at the applause, disgusted with herself. Disgusted with the icy grip that clasped her elbow. Disgusted with the monstrous display of color and grins before her. She managed the weakest of smiles as a small part of her soul died in response. She swallowed thickly, as her breath came in shallow gasps. From the back of the ballroom, movement caught her eye as she saw Haymitch, Cinna and Portia pushing and pulling Peeta from the room. Her grey eyes locked with blue, and the rage and anguish etched across his face caused tears to spring to her eyes, as a pain so sharp and raw wretched her heart.

"This way," Paasch's cold drawl registered as his grip grew tighter, leading her down the grand stair.

She shuddered as she realized where she was being taken. To the side of the ballroom, a throne had been set up, and President Snow, sat upon it in all his unholy glory. He was clearly a cruel man, surveying the ballroom in stoic disdain.

Paasch approached towing Katniss beside him, and an odd flicker resonated in the President's eyes. It wasn't a friendly gesture, as he stood and surveyed his supposed friend from twelve. He looked angry as he saw Katniss clutched in his grasp. Paasch had bragged at length of his friendship with the President of Panem, but as they approached the icy glare of President Snow, she suddenly realized Paasch had been lying all along. They were not friends at all. Not even close.

"Ahh, President Snow!" Paasch's voice was uncharacteristically smarmy as he pulled Katniss up short in front of the platform. President Snow's eyes were alight with primeval anger as he surveyed Vickram.

"Remind me?" President Snow coldly sneered.

"Paasch Vikram, of course…" Paasch's tone faltered under the President's disinterested gaze. "Of twelve… Our Father's were friends."

"Mhmm." The President turned his gaze back to the ballroom. Katniss' blood ran cold. It was one thing to be in the presence of the man you feared most. But it was entirely another to be in the presence of the person they feared most.

"I'd like to introduce you to my bride, the Tribute from twelve."

This seemed to retain the President's attention,

"Bride…? From twelve?" He asked, a quiet furry brimming behind his dark eyes.

"Yes, Sir. Poor Dear volunteered for an undeserving little girl, but I think we both can agree the odds will be in her favor." His tone was overly suggestive.

"Indeed." The President nearly snarled. Katniss maintained her gaze with the floor, unwilling to take on the deep dark gaze of their country's ruler. She could feel Paasch bristle at her side at the President's tone. None of this boded well for them. Suddenly the dress made so much sense. It was a last ditch effort to maintain solidarity with Capitol. A walking emblem to prove Paasch's deep support and loyalty to Snow. She hated being his billboard. His prop.

She could sense Paasch floundering. Always one to mask her true emotions, Katniss replied graciously,

"Come, let's not bother the President further on this exciting night. We aught to enjoy the generous opportunity of the evening. Dance with me?"

President Snow turned his gaze to the young girl at this. A shrewd and calculating look passing over his dark eyes.

"Miss Mellark isn't it?" Katniss swallowed hard at his words and made a simple nod, "Since you are so fond of dancing, would you be so kind as to dance with me?" He held out his hand to her.

Paasch nearly pushed Katniss towards the President, eagerness alight in his eyes.

"That would be lovely, Sir." Katniss smiled hollowly, as her heart plummeted. His fingers were cold like death, but he took her hand and held it like a vice grip.

Leading her out onto the dance floor, the crowd parted like a curtain to let them pass.

"You made quite the impression this evening Miss Mellark." President Snow drawled with the air of one who couldn't care less. His other hand wrapped around the small of her waist as he began to glide her about the now empty dance floor.

"Oh, yes… the dress Cinna designed was lovely." Her voice sounded small even to her own ear, as President Snow twirled her. All eyes were upon them, some were paired with smiles, while other's were paired with the tight lips that accompanied jealousy.

"You looked… very lovely," His hand at her back inched lower, causing her skin to crawl.

"Thank you, Sir. That is kind of you to say," She replied weakly. He was a graceful dancer, and she matched him step for step. Gossip mongers of the upper elite would undoubtedly chatter idly into the night about it. They made a fine dancing pair, each step perfectly placed, each word perfectly uttered in a delicate dance of mock civility.

"I'll be interested to watch your performance in the arena." His voice had an unnerving charm to it, like sugar coated poison. A gentle anger rolled through Katniss at his words. Raising her head to look him in the eye for the first time, her voice strong, she responded,

"I'll be sure not to disappoint you, Sir." Her eyes were steel as she matched his even gaze, a fierce braveness lighting up her very bones. The music died out and the song ended. "Thank you ever so much for the dance." She made a low curtsey, her voice dripping with contempt. Not wanting to be immediately accosted by Vickram, she slipped into the crowd quickly, working her way towards the back of the ballroom. She beckoned her heart to slow it's pace, but it would not relent. If only she could make it to a bathroom…

As she neared the back of the brightly colored mob, she suddenly felt a tight grip on her arm pulling her away from the crowd. She looked up into the ice blue eyes of a livid Peeta. She swallowed hard, as his gaze pierced right through her.

"Peeta," She breathed, alarmed by his tight grip and dark gaze.

"We need to talk. Now!" His voice was a low growl.

XXXX

Katniss suddenly found herself in an apartment off the main hallway down from the ballroom, likely reserved for dignitaries. It was exceptionally furnished, with a large sitting room complete with a massive stone fireplace. It's roaring fire filled the dark room with shadows.

"What the hell were you thinking wearing that!" Peeta hissed, finally dropping his hand from her arm, as he pushed her further into the sitting room.

"It will get us sponsors." She offered lamely, not wanting to bring up Prim.

"Don't! Don't make excuses for this! Fuck sponsors Katniss! I don't want them this way!" He pointed at her dress, the Capitol Flag blazing. A look of disgust washed over his features. "It's not worth it. You like some kind of capitol wh…" Before he could finish the word Katniss raised her little palm to slap him. Perhaps his reflexes were perfectly honed from year's of hunting, but he was much too quick as he snatched her wrist mid strike. Holding her arm between them his eyes black and boiling with a hot mess of unspoken emotions. He chose his next words carefully,

"You know, I never expected you to be just as calculating as your mother."

"How dare you!" She wrenched her arm from his grasp, "I am nothing like my mother!" He tried to ignore the depth of anguish that registered in her eyes at his words. He swallowed them down like bitter bile, clinging to his anger,

"You're honestly going to say that while still wearing that dress! She probably picked it out for him." He sneered, ignoring the voice in the back of his mind that begged for him to stop, "Did you like the attention you got! Did you enjoy it?"

It suddenly dawned on her that he sounded jealous. The implications of this realization shook her to the core.

"It's just a stupid dress Peeta. It doesn't mean anything!" She yelled at him, backing further into the room.

"It means everything!" He bellowed as he followed her until the light of the fireplace up lit his face in menacing shadows. The heat from it poured over them, only aiding in fueling his hot soul.

"Fine!" Katniss yelled at him. Reaching up, she ripped the fabric from around her neck, the dress floated to the floor around her. Stepping out of it with one black stilettoed foot, she kicked it into the fireplace with the other, and watched as the flames flared up and consumed it. Truth be told, she had wanted to do that all night. She stood and watched it burn, her shaking hands on her hips, until it was completely gone.

"There! Are you happy!" She spat at Peeta.

With a scowl, she marched towards the hallway hoping to find a bathroom, willing her tears to hold back until she could close the door. She caught her reflection in one of the many mirrors about the room, suddenly acutely aware that she was now only clad in the black panty and bra set. They were also Capitol made, but she wasn't that desperate to prove a point. Casting a sideways glance at Peeta, his eyes overflowed with unbridled fury. Holding her head high as she passed him, she did not expect his hand to latch around her arm, and pull her to face him. It wasn't rough, but she was startled nonetheless. Stumbling on her high heels she fell against him, her palms smoothing out against his chest as she caught herself.

"No, I'm not happy!" He growled. "You're acting like a child."

"We are children Peeta." Her voice was soft and serious.

"No," He choked out, "I stopped being a child the day my father died." He pushed her back away from him, "And you certainly don't look like a child." He glanced down briefly, his cheeks reddening. His dark eyes were black and cold, making Katniss suddenly feel dirty. She instinctively crossed her arms over her chest, hating herself as the tears finally started to fall.

Suddenly the sound of the door to the apartment being opened echoed through the spacious great room. They could hear a high-pitched giggle as stilettoes stumbled down the tile floor in the front hall.

All of a sudden Peeta, stepped in front of Katniss. It was an involuntary reaction and he cursed himself for it, his anger still potent. Reaching out, he grabbed her arm, pushing her down the hallway off the sitting area. As quickly and quietly as he could manage he pulled her toward the door at then end of the hall. Suddenly finding himself in a large and immaculate bedroom, he glanced quickly about the room. It was done in all black and white, save for a giant red lacquered chandelier that hung low in the room. He closed the door carefully and placed his ear against it to listen. His heart dropped as he heard the couple's footsteps coming down their hall.

Pulling Katniss with him he opened the door to what he thought was a bathroom. Instead, they suddenly found themselves crammed closely into a linen closet. It was a tight fit with a shutter door that allowed them a slotted view of the room at large.

"Peeta!" She hissed as he pushed her hard against the shelves. Clamping a hand over her mouth, he listened intently to the people as they reach the end of the hall.

Katniss nearly jumped out of her skin as she heard the door to the room slam open. Peeta pushed her back further against the shelves, once again attempting to shield her from the door.

The two Capitolites that burst into the room were a mess of limbs and lips, and drunken fondling. The young couple fell onto the white bed, clawing at each other's clothes, sounds of gasps, sighs, and moans escaping their lips and echoing up to the tall ceiling.

Katniss and Peeta watched in horror as the couple began to disrobe. They were granted a half view through the slots of the door, but they could clearly see the girl with white long hair, unclasp her neon bra. The young man could have been considered handsome were it not for his lime green hair and obnoxious facial tattoos. He wasted not a moment before fisting both of the girl's breasts as he drunkenly kissed her, his lips sloppy and swift. Katniss's cheeks burned a bright red before she dropped her gaze to the floor of the closet, mortified to bear witness to their private moment.

The couple slurped and licked at each other for a moment longer before the young woman reached low to unbutton the man from his pants. Peeta, swallowed reflexively in embarrassment, suddenly acutely aware of the few inches of air separating him and Katniss.

All at once the young man was fully disrobed, and both Peeta and Katniss starred in horror at his nakedness. Their mouths both dropping open in unison.

"Oh Rastor!" The young woman gasped. "You're magnificent!" Her voice was musical in its lilting Capitol accent. The two tributes from twelve were paralyzed by her words as they stared at the monstrosity that was the young man's penis. It looked as though it had been dipped in a permanent gold paint. His member glinted in the dim lighting, as the young Capitolite woman looked on reverently.

Suddenly Katniss turned to look up at Peeta, her eyes wide with shock. His gaze mirrored her own. She looked back at the couple, and then back at him.

Peeta was certain she had lost her mind when she began to silently laugh. He instantly clamped his hand over her mouth, as she nearly doubled over, her shoulders shaking, eyes wild. Leaning into him as she laughed silently, tears began to leak from the corners of her eyes. He was about ready to shake her or slap her, when she looked up at him with her deep grey eyes, filled with mirth, and he couldn't help himself as he smirked down at her, suddenly aware of the utter absurdness of the moment they found themselves in.

Maybe they were losing their minds. Maybe the whole fucking mess they found themselves in had finally caught up, and they were snapping together, but suddenly he was laughing uncontrollably too. Trying desperately to keep silent as his shoulders shook. The couple was oblivious as they continued to grope each other, their own pants and gasps drowning out any noise from the closet. It felt so wrong to be laughing considering the seriousness of the matter, but for some reason, that just made him laugh harder. He dropped his hand to his side, as Katniss clutched at her own. She pointed at it, and for some reason this sent them into new waves of uncontrollable fits of barely contained laughter.

Suddenly Katniss snorted loudly and audibly, and the moment cracked as Peeta clamped one hand over her mouth as his other hand reached out and connected with her bare side, his long fingers wrapping around her torso.

And just like that, all the laughing was gone. In it's place the moment was strung so tight it could snap. They were suddenly acutely aware of their close proximity, her lack of clothing, and his strong fingers resting against her full lips. Katniss' eyes darted to the side to see if the couple heard, and immediately regretted it as her cheeks burned crimson. At some point the young woman had lowered herself over 'Rastor' and she was clutching his shoulders as she pumped her body over him her back arched as she gasped. Her eyes snapped back to Peeta, both ashamed and ignited to have seen such a thing.

His eyes were as black as an abyss as he starred down at her. As if to test the moment, he bravely brushed his thumb upwards over her ribs, unable to stop himself. Katniss let out a soft gasp in response, her lips parting slightly against his fingers. Her eyes brimmed with an unfathomable intensity, and his body shuddered in response.

The panting of the couple reached a loud crescendo as they finished and fell back onto the bed.

"Oh…oh Rastor… that was just… wow." The young woman attempted to catch her breath, as a slack jawed and satisfied Rastor just smirked beside her.

"We better get you back to your husband," He smiled down at her, as he twirled a bit of her white hair around his finger. She slapped his hand away playfully.

"I know… you're wife has probably been looking everywhere for you." she sighed, as she began collecting her clothes.

"And Hock, for you."

"I doubt it," She muttered bitterly before turning to him, "When will I see you again?" She pouted, as she slipped back into her undergarments. Rastor rolled his eyes at this.

"I don't know. Not for a while, we have to be careful." His voice was placating, like he was talking to a small, dumb child.

"You mean, when it's convenient for you!" She shot back at him.

"Oh don't be like that, Tally!" His annoyance flared up at once, as he buttoned his pants.

"No! You know what? Just forget it!" She pulled her dress back on roughly, grabbing her shoes up from the floor, and marching towards the door.

"Tally! You know that's not what this is!" He yelled at her retreating form as he slipped back into his shoes, and pulled his shirt up off the floor. He slipped it on, and hastily stuffed it into his pants before buttoning. In a moment he was out of the room, following his miffed mistress towards the door.

Katniss and Peeta, both let out their breath as they heard the front door slam shut.

"What was that?" Katniss marveled as Peeta opened the closet door, eager to be out of the restricting space.

Peeta shook his head as he leaned towards the open door, listening to make sure they were gone.

"I can't believe that just happened," Peeta reached up and rubbed the back of his neck. He turned to look down at her, and took in her half naked and lovely form. "Um… we need to find you something to wear." Katniss nodded awkwardly, her arms folded across her chest. Suddenly their fight from before assaulted their memory with a vengeance.

Peeta was too emotionally drained to care about what or why it was that he was angry. All that sat with him now was a gnawing guilt about the horrible things he said to her.

"Peeta…I'm sorry about the dress, but I didn't feel like I had a choice…"

"Fuck…" Peeta breathed, "Katniss no… you have nothing to apologize for… I know why you wore it…. I was angry at seeing…" he swallowed hard, unable to say his name, "… and I took it out on you. It wasn't right, and you have nothing to apologize for." He rubbed his temples, unable to meet her eyes as his pride stuck over the words he really needed to say. She fidgeted, holding her elbows,

"It's been a long couple of days… it's okay…"

"No, Katniss. It's not okay. There's no excuse for me treating you like that. There's no excuse for anyone ever treating you like that." He shuddered at this thought. Finally looking into her eyes he swallowed hard, "I'm sorry, Katniss." Tears pricked the corners of her eye, and she made a simple nod, looking away. Peeta's heart sank to the bottom of his chest as he realized his words from before were still very alive and potent in her mind. "Please forgive me." He pleaded, reaching a hand out to her elbow, so she would look at him. He was startled at the look in her eyes when she finally turned to face him,

"Of course I forgive you, Peeta." Her voice was soft and on the verge of breaking, as she shivered.

He started to unbutton his dress shirt at once, thankful Portia had provided him with an undershirt. Pulling it off he helped slip it over Katniss' shoulders. Without thinking he started to button it for her starting at the bottom and working his way up. It was a habit left over from years of taking care of Prim. Suddenly he realized what he was doing, as his hands reached the third button from the top, and his gaze was suddenly level with the curve of her breasts, covered by the black lace. He swallowed hard unable to tear his gaze away, as his cheeks burned a brilliant red and a shudder ran down his spine.

"Peeta?" Katniss' amused voice pulled his gaze up, "I got it," dropping his hands to his side immediately, he opened his mouth to apologize, but no words came.

XXX

"Where's your dress!" Effie gasped as she surveyed the disheveled state of her tributes in the hallway outside the ballroom. Haymitch quirked a brow as he watched Katniss attempt to pull the shirt down lower than mid thigh.

"It caught on fire." Katniss shrugged, sharing a knowing glance with a smirking Peeta. Haymitch's eyebrows grew wide as he looked between the two of them. Finally a single chortle escaped his mouth. And then finally a howling laughter burst forth and echoed down the hallway.

To be continued…

A/N: (I never read these either, so feel free to skip :-)

Thank you so much for the encouraging words. They really affect me, and make me want to work harder, and stretch myself. That being said, I won't post a chapter until I'm sufficiently satisfied with it, so sadly, the postings won't be a daily occurrence, please don't hate me. (I could still use a beta to catch my many mistakes if there is any interest?)

There have been a few comments/ questions that I'd like to address now:

Yes it was Prim's finger. I'm sorry about that. I debated over adding that in length, and felt it was just too emotional of a scene to not put in. I left it a bit ambiguous on purpose by never specifically stating that is was Prim's finger…. I don't know… it just seemed more potent that way? Like how things draw power and strength by never addressing them head on?

I received an awesome PM from someone asking about Katniss, that just really made me think hard about her character within the confines of this AU. They questioned my original authors note about the whole switcher-roo, and how Katniss didn't seem to have Peeta's charismatic/ outgoing quality. Katniss comes off very reserved and insecure in this story. Which I completely agreed with. In Suzanne's Hunger Games, Peeta's mom is a bit of a bitch. In my A/U Arabella Mellark is absolutely heinous. I think that is why this Katniss can't be immediately charismatic. Her upbringing was just too emotionally stunting for that to make sense. However, I really did mull over the comment, and I think there is validity to it. I'm hoping that now Katniss is out from under her mother's constant domineering presence, Katniss will begin to evolve. (Spoiler alert!) Thanks so much for taking the time to consider and question… it means a lot, and really made me take a step back and look at it. Thoughts/ concerns like these are always always encouraged and welcome! Grazie!

I have ridiculous plans for this story. In a few short chapters, it will be nothing like the Hunger Games book, we're about to get seriously AU, and I pumped to know your reaction to it!


	7. Chapter 7

(Apologies for the long delay. As always thanks so much for the encouraging words. :-)

Chapter 7:

The slap of flesh and a sick crunch of breaking bone echoed through the massive training hall as Peeta slammed Cato's face into the wall with unnatural force. A guttural tone roared from Cato, blood curdling and raw as he thrashed back against Peeta. Blood, dark and thick, pumped from Cato's nose in time with his erratic heartbeats. It gushed out in pulses as Peeta stymied his attempt to get free. Growing desperate Cato realized he was fully subdued by the smaller though stronger male from twelve. He breathed short violent gulps of air as he spit blood against the wall in splattered patterns. Eyes glittering black, he let out a loud feral growl.

From a distance, they all heard the whistles and shouts of the advancing Peacekeepers. Peeta only tightened his grip in response. He cast a quick glance down to the floor to see a wide-eyed and terrified Katniss backing away on her hands. Blood trickled from a gash on her forehead. Around them the other tributes had gathered.

Not one person stepped forward to free Cato. Not one dared to approach Peeta. The trained killer from two had been rendered impotent by a monstrous show of strength. None of the emaciated wretches from twelve ever had strength, and they certainly never fought back.

The cluster of Tributes shared one thought in unison. He saw one boy whisper to another, their dark eyes narrowing in on him. He didn't need to hear what was said to know their exchange. It was written across their faces plainly. It was written in their guarded and anxious stances and in their clenched fists. It was written in their eyes, that bright mixture of mortal fear and lasting promise.

Peeta Everdeen would be the first to die in the arena.

XXXX

(Six Hours Prior)

"Good heavens, where _is_ that girl?" Effie paced along the length of the dining table as Haymitch shoveled a spoonful of breakfast potatoes past his chapped lips. Forgetting to chew, he instantly broke into a spastic coughing fit, spitting bits of food projectile style all across the table. Effie backed away, disgusted. She opened her mouth to say something, but shut it at once and marched from the room, muttering under her breath. An Avox poured Haymitch a glass of water, which he promptly refused with a push of his hand, as he gripped the tumbler full of his standard. Throwing it back in one gulp, tears began to leak from the corners of his eyes as his coughing slowed.

"Are you alright?" Peeta asked, half alarmed, half amused at his mentor's episode. Haymitch glowered in response as he slowly regained control of himself. From the hall they could hear Effie pounding on Katniss' door.

"Katniss!" She drew out the 's' sound as those with capitol accents were want to do, and rapped a succinct 'rat-a-tat' on the door again, "Hurry up!... Please!" She added as an after thought. "We are needed down in the training facility in ten minuets! Can someone _please _get this door open!" She had yelled it to no one in particular, but Peeta noticed two Avoxes move towards the hallway from the corner of his eye. Their help, in the end, was not required as the door opened and a breathless Katniss breezed into the dining area, her hair still dripping wet.

"Sorry," she called back to Effie as she plucked an orange from the pile of fruit on the table, and slumped into the chair across from Peeta. Effie, glided in behind her and snatched her clipboard up from the table, giving it yet another 'once over' as she tapped her pen against the side of it.

Katniss busied herself with peeling her orange as she attempted to avoid the piercing blue eyes across the table. After making it to her bedroom the night before, she lay in the plush bed and stared at the ceiling. She stared and stared and stared. Sleep eluding her as the multitude of emotions swirling about in her mind crashed down upon her relentlessly. She had slept in his shirt, unable to take it off. Smelling the collar from time to time as a baby would a security blanket.

"How'd you sleep?" his soft, strong voice startled her from her thoughts as she dropped the orange onto the plate with an audible, 'clank'. Grey eyes collided into blue, as she returned his gaze.

"Not well," it was barely a whisper, and she couldn't help herself as her cheeks tinted pink. The blush betrayed her secrets. He stared at her for a moment before the corner of his mouth tipped up into the slightest of smirks. He reached for an apple and took a bite from it, his eyes never leaving hers,

"Me either."

XXXX

Atala was a truly fearsome woman.

Standing upon the first station's platform, her towering height demanded attention. She stared down at them with a shrewd eye and cemented grimace. One would get the impression that she didn't particularly care for her job. She approached it as you would any necessary burden: with haste and an overwhelming sense of detachment.

She sugarcoated nothing. At least they were afforded that dignity. Saying the words they were all loathe to hear, but needed to embrace. She spoke about their impending deaths with such a serious finality that by the end of her speech even the career tributes were quiet and still.

"Don't let your arrogance best you," her voice boomed and echoed throughout the iron rafters of the training hall, "Most of you will die from exposure. Do not pass up the opportunity of the survival stations. We will break for lunch at 2:00. Tributes will NOT engage in any form of combat prior to the games. Use your time wisely. You are dismissed."

And with that they were off. The Careers headed straight for the weapon stations. The others lingered only for a moment before shuffling over to whatever station had caught their eye.

Katniss noticed that the Fire Making Station was vacant. Having lost sight of Peeta, who had stood at the far end of the group, she decided to give it a shot.

On the elevator ride down, Peeta had explained that he felt it was important that the other tributes not know they were a team. Haymitch had dually agreed, going on at length about the edge it would give them. Katniss had nodded along, however now in the midst of it, she couldn't help the nagging sense of abandonment as he intentionally ignored her. He walked in to the gym with out her, stood far away from her, and didn't look at her once. She knew it was an irrational response given the situation, but her already dark mood was nevertheless flavored sour.

Katniss, as it happened, was good at starting fires. You couldn't work around ovens all day with out being skilled at that. Her mother was always quite neglectful of the business needs of the bakery, and the task of compensating for a lack of materials fell to Katniss. She could start a fire from nearly anything. She could use a knife against flint. That was standard. But from time to time the flint disappeared. Several times she used a broken bit of her father's glasses. At high noon when a lonely ray of light shot down into the chimney, she would position the lens over some hay until it started to smoke. The key was then to keep the fire going all day and night. Before that she used the groove of an old wooden cutting board and the broken handle of an old knife. By rubbing the handle in the groove over and over enough friction would cause the dry grass to ignite.

By the end of her time at the station she had been taught how to make a drill from a bendable twig and a shoelace. The station trainer praised her patient skills at helping the ember grow into a large flame.

From there, she moved on to the Edible Insects Station and studied specifically the poisonous bugs. It seemed more important to know the threats of the game makers than the little mercies of the few edible bugs.

As the day progressed, she made her way over to the hand to hand combat station and was laid out on her back five times in a row before she managed to master the most basic of offensive maneuvers. She was covered in a light sheen of sweat as she attempted yet again to throw her instructor over her shoulder. He pointed out the weak areas of the body, and gave her a bow staff to practice on a dummy, targeting said weak points. Ear, throat, back of the knee, back of the thigh, back of the neck, crotch, lower back, lower abdomen. He showed her how to grip an assortment of knives and how to twist it after puncturing an appendage to cause more damage and added debilitation. She shuddered as she played at killing him, knowing all the while that in a few short days this would be her reality.

She looked out at the faces of the other children she would be tasked with killing and an unrelenting sadness swept her up with such an ardent force that she lost her breath. Some seemed just as lost and scared as her. Others, the survivor types, had come to grips with their reality and were soaking up the knowledge offered like a dirty sponge. The six careers exuded a sick sense of excitement and raced around the stations as though it was a game. To them, she supposed, it was. They acted like giddy children as they played with the gleaming Capitol toys. Machetes, axes, bone saws, scythes, maces covered in spikes, and other various death instruments Katniss didn't know the names of.

Across the room she saw Peeta approached the empty shooting range. His hands gently caressed the metal bows as he thoughtfully decided which one to pick up. Holding up a shiny stainless steel bow he held it out to survey how it was weighted.

Katniss bit back a smile as she watched him. It was a well-known _secret_ in Twelve that Peeta knew how to bow hunt. She had never seen him do it of course, but from all the game he and Gale brought back, he was obviously quite skilled at it. Even assuming this, she was not prepared.

Her mouth dropped open with the rest of the hall as their attention was drawn to the odd noise the metal tip of the arrow made as it sunk into the cork targets. Having held four arrows up to the bow between his fingers, he let one go at a time at each of the four targets, hitting each one square on in rapid succession.

Shock and silence abounded.

"Do you have any moving targets?" Peeta's voice echoed in the now quiet gym, and a collective shudder worked its way down the other tributes' spines. The trainers, happy to oblige, pulled out a machine that shot out weighted cork disks.

His aim was impeccable. By the time they broke for lunch, half the tributes, Katniss included, were standing towards the back just watching him. Three trainers would shoot off three disks at once in their attempt to challenge him. They were just about to pull out a fourth machine when Atala blew the whistle for lunch.

XXXX

Having no appetite, and no desire to form connections with the people she was about to kill, Katniss sat at the back of the room at a lonely table and pushed around the food on her plate. She was fighting the urge to look over at Peeta when she was drawn from her thoughts by the sound of a tray dropping on the table next to her followed by a flash of long blonde hair.

"So… you're very pretty," the words dripped from her mouth in an accusatory tone. Glimmer turned her grey-green eyes on Katniss, looking her over with narrowed slits. Katniss didn't know how to respond, so she didn't. Drawing a strawberry up to her full lips, Glimmer asked, "So, what's the deal with the boy from your district?"

Ah… so she was on a recon mission. It wasn't surprising. Peeta had taken to the archery range on purpose. It was his attempt to psyche out the careers. Apparently it had worked. Katniss narrowed her eyes in return,

"I barely know him," She lied as smoothly as she could, as she forced herself to eat a grape.

"Oh please," Glimmer scoffed, "I don't believe that for a second." She stabbed at a piece of meat on her plate, "I think the two of you know each other quite well. You think we haven't noticed the way he looks at you?" Katniss tried to ignore the beat her heart skipped at this, "You'd be wise to tell me what you know. I _could_ make things easier for you."

"I don't know him," Katniss repeated mechanically, suddenly aware that they'd been watching them all along.

"I don't think you understand what I'm offering here!" Glimmer hissed, her voice turning cruel.

"I don't think _you_ understand that I _don't_ care." Katniss responded, trying to sound brave. Glimmer's eyes turned dark at this, as her lovely lips turned thin in a hard grimace.

"You just made a huge mistake!" Glimmer spat, picking up her tray roughly and returning to her seat at the Career table, swaying her hips angrily as she went. Katniss wondered if she was not accustomed to getting her way. Glimmer huddled down and whispered something to the group animatedly and Katniss suddenly found all of their eyes upon her. She shifted her gaze back down to her plate, but not before catching the sadistic leer on Cato's face.

XXXX

"Quite the dress you were wearing last night."

Katniss cringed as Cato approached her at the table of throwing knives. His arm gently and purposely brushed hers as he reached over for a gruesome hunting knife. "And they call us pets," he sneered. Katniss swallowed hard and stepped away. Nervously glancing about for the station's trainer, Cato noticed the shift of her gaze and asked,

"Looking for Loverboy?" His tone was equal parts menacing and mocking. Katniss' mouth went dry as her heart rate sped.

"I don't know what you're talking about," she tried to play it off, but they both heard the waver in her voice.

"Knock it off!" Cato hissed as he stepped towards her, his curtain of civility blowing up for only a moment before it fluttered back down and he schooled his moment of rage. "I also saw him pull you from the ballroom… Where did you two go?"

"I… what!" Katniss stammered, afraid to step back again. Cato leaned in and her blood ran cold,

"Loverboy give you a quick fuck in the closet?" He leered down at her, his eyes dark and terrifying.

"That's absurd!" Katniss spat, repulsed by his vulgar language, as well as alarmed at his mention of a closet.

"Is it?" Cato stepped in closer, his voice challenging. Katniss eyes went wide. Did he know? "I can't really blame him though," he eyed her up and down lasciviously, "I'd kill to have those legs wrapped around me." Katniss's shuddered in horror at the thought. "Literally," he added, "I'd _kill_ for it," his tone was deadly serious.

"I don't know him," Katniss managed to get out, trying to change the subject from his implied threat. Her heart slammed against her chest wildly, as warning bells rang in her mind at a dizzying volume.

"Then why did you volunteer for his sister?" he asked while spinning the tip of the knife on his pointer finger.

"Apparently I have a death wish," she replied evenly.

"Apparently." Cato looked up and a cruel smirk lit up his face, "He's looking over here," Katniss' fist clenched as she fought the urge to look back, her heart sinking to the bottom of her stomach, "Now, why do you think he'd do that?" Cato sneered patronizingly.

"Probably just worried I'm making an alliance with you," She cringed at her lame excuse.

"Now, now…" Cato smiled down at her with wild eyes, "You already had your chance at that didn't you?" His creepy smile fell away, and was replaced by a horrifying glare as his voice rose, "But_ instead_ you'd rather lie to my face! I don't like being lied to, Katniss," he hissed her name, and Katniss took a step back.

"I'm not lying," she lied.

"Everything okay over here?"

And suddenly he was there, and Katniss could breath again. Peeta spoke the question directly to her. She looked up at him, unable to speak, unsure of what to say. His jaw clenched involuntarily, as he searched her face.

"Don't know him, huh?" Cato leered. Peeta didn't even bother with a glance at Cato. He simply ignored his existence all together. Katniss marveled at how calm he appeared.

"Let's go," Peeta nodded towards the next station. Katniss swallowed hard and nodded. She started to edge her way around Cato who was gripping the knife with white knuckles. She was just out of his reach when Cato shot out his foot, hooking it in front of Katniss'. She hardly had a moment to realize what was happening as she tumbled forward so fast, her forehead smacking the corner of the table as she went down.

Peeta stood and watched it as though in slow motion.

And then, his mind went black.

XXXX

It took six peacekeepers to pull them apart. Chaos had erupted in the hall. There were whistles and yells, and people being pushed out of the way. Just as each young man was being dragged roughly towards a separate door, Cato snarled,

"I'm going to kill her slowly and make you watch, Everdeen!" Blood bubbled from his nose and mouth as he screamed his promises, "You're both dead! DEAD!"

(To be cont.)

Always love to hear your thoughts and feedback… thanks for reading!

**Not sure what the comments about my story getting possibly deleted were about? I think I'm out of the loop… Regardless, I compose in word, so everything is saved, thanks for your concern though… you guys are sweet


	8. Chapter 8

A/N: Really not sure how I feel about this chap… but I feel like I've kept it from you long enough, and I'm sick of attempted editing. Sorry to say this chapter is just a lil guy…

Chapter 8:

"Effie's looking for you," Haymitch threw over his shoulder at Katniss as he shuffled towards the living room. Katniss cringed, and then hissed as the stiches from her recently dressed head wound pulled at the skin sharply.

She had been in the infirmary for unnecessary hours. It had felt like she sat alone on the cold metal table for ages waiting for the Capitol doctor. The glaring white walls had made her eyes water at their crude brightness. At least that's what she had told herself. Cato had shaken her to her core. His threats, his attack, the terror she had felt under his vicious dark gaze had left her feeling so week and so powerless that she couldn't help the tears that fell.

If his intention had been to manipulate her mind, it had worked. Her hands wouldn't stop shaking, as thoughts crashed upon her weighing her down. _What would they do to Peeta?_ A rib-cracking sob had escaped her at this thought and a palpable guilt had crawled into her bones like a spreading virus. She could have just walked away from him. Peeta wouldn't have come over if she would have just been brave enough to walk to the next station. She could have gone up to a trainer to ask questions, and Cato wouldn't have followed her. She could have prevented this.

As she watched Haymitch's retreating form she thought to ask if Peeta was back yet, but the words stuck in her throat like cotton. Instead, she walked down the dimly lit hallway toward his door. She was just about to knock, but paused mid way when the door flew open, and a strong grip clasped around her wrist and jerked her into the room. She barley had time to utter a yelp of surprise as she was pushed back against the door as it closed.

She stared up into his eyes that glowed like blue fire, and swallowed down a lump of dread.

"What did he say to you!?" Peeta demanded, still grasping her wrist between them. His closeness was intimidating, and she could barely register a thought. Her mouth parted slightly, but no words would come.

"What did he say!" Peeta repeated, his low tone causing the hair on the back of her neck to rise, as his eyes bored into her.

"I… I…" she tried as she became mesmerized by the intensity in his hypnotic eyes, "He… asked me how I knew you," she finally released in a jumbled breath. Peeta let out a frustrated sigh at this,

"What did you tell him?"

"I told him I didn't… he said I was lying. He knew," she breathed.

"How could he know!? We were so careful all morning," Peeta asked in cutting disbelief.

"He saw us leave the ballroom together last night," her voice tumbled out in a small waver.

"That doesn't mean we know each other… we could have… had to meet with our mentor for all he knew."

Katniss flushed crimson as she recalled Cato's crass words. It was the most ardent of tells.

"What? What else did he say?" Peeta demanded as he watched her cheeks heat.

"Peeta… I…" Katniss stammered, shaking her head from side to side.

"Tell me!" He moved in closer, trying to keep her eyes locked on him.

"I can't…"

"Damn it, Katniss!" Peeta huffed, tightening the grasp on her wrist that had loosened. With his other hand he reached up and firmly tilted her yielding chin so she met his eyes, "What did he say!?" He articulated each word with precision.

Katniss' breathing stopped the moment he touched her face. All she could hear was the loud pounding of her heart in her ears. Mustering every ounce of courage she had, she broached the topic she was loath to discuss. She suddenly felt as though she was edging off a cliff preparing her mind and body to jump.

"He thinks we're together… like a couple, they all do," she wanted to drop her eyes to the floor, afraid of his reaction, but she bravely kept her eyes trained on his determined to see his reaction. The flash in his eyes didn't escape her notice. Neither did the involuntary clench of his jaw, or the way his features relaxed for the briefest of moments before his stony resolve slipped back over his face.

"Why would they think that?" His tone was much softer, like a breath that fluttered across her face. Katniss' heart dropped to the floor at his dismissal of the obvious. Her bravery deserted her as she too denied any knowledge,

"I don't know…"

"Yes you do," he challenged quietly. For reasons unknown to Katniss this made her irrevocably angry. It was fine for him to deny that anything was transpiring between them but when she followed suit he challenged it? Had he suddenly forgotten? Had he forgotten how he'd told her she was gorgeous? She couldn't have been the only one that quietly died as he touched her in the closet. How could he deny that his dark eyes had mirrored hers, laced with lust the moment his finger touched her lips. How could he explain the way his cheeks had heated as he stared at her, or the way his voice dripped with innuendo at breakfast. The more she thought the angrier she became.

"Why did you hit him!?" She demanded her voice shaky, and her eyes fierce, "Why did you slam his face into the wall!?"

"What!?" Peeta stepped back at her tone, "He purposely tripped you, I thought he might try something why you were down. It was a reflex."

"A reflex?" Katniss' tone was cold as she burned with pain dressed up as anger.

"You're trying to change the subject," Peeta challenged, "What did Cato say to you!?"

"I don't remember," she spat, as she turned to leave the room, too angry and hurt to continue the conversation. With her hand on the door, Peeta grabbed her shoulders and pinned her back against the door,

"You're not telling me something, and I'm not going to let you leave this room until you tell me!"

She was getting sick of his demands while he refused to acknowledge that she meant something to him. That everyone was wrong in assuming something was going on between them. The floodgates opened and the words she never thought she'd repeat tumbled from her mouth stabbing the air as they went,

"He asked if you took me from the ballroom to give me a quick fuck in a closet! That's what he said!" Peeta looked as though he'd been slapped across the face, shocked at both her spoken words and the instantaneous barrage of mental images that assaulted his mind, making him burn.

"He approached me, because he was trying to draw you out! He knew you would reveal our relationship if he threatened me!" Peeta could deny that they had a relationship all he wanted, but she refused to call it anything other than what it was.

Peeta swallowed hard, unsure of what to say. He finally settled on deflection,

"Did he threaten you?" She nearly hated him for the deep concern laden in his words.

"Of course he did!" Her anger swept her up, "He's been tasked with killing me and the rest of us in a few days, Peeta!" She knew she shouldn't say the next words that were drawn forth, but she couldn't let the issue drop, "He said he couldn't blame you, that he'd kill to have me in that way…" Katniss wasn't sure what reaction she was hoping to garner from Peeta at those words, but she was ill prepared for the white-hot rage that flashed forward, "Though he couldn't have known there's nothing going on between us… right?" She threw his denial back at him. She relished the sudden unguarded expression that ghosted across his face at her words. It was the only proof that she was right and she clung to it like a drowning woman.

Peeta blinked hard. He knew she was baiting him. He knew she was fishing for some sort of declaration from him. His mind screamed at him to admit what he knew she wanted to hear, but the words caught like glass shards in his throat.

He'd spent years and years denying that she affected him. The night he had officially met her had been the most horrific experience of his life. They had only been eleven years old. He shuddered at the memory, pushing it like always to the deep recesses of his mind. That experience had grafted their souls together. Denying it for years and years did little to negate the fact that it was an absolute truth.

All the fight deserted him as he looked into her pained eyes. Like a twisting knife to the heart torturing the words from him, he was desperate to admit it all to her. To admit that for years upon years she'd been all he'd thought of. That he had transformed those unrelenting thoughts into hateful notions because he couldn't come to terms with the true reason of why she was always on his mind. He wanted to admit that she was the only girl he'd ever dreamed of. That he had dated all those simpering town girls out of desperation to rid her from his mind. That those poor girls never lasted for long because the momentary distraction they provided was forever fleeting. He wanted to admit that the handful of times he'd slept with other girls, not once could he keep her from his thoughts. The years of repression had broken him. He couldn't say what she wanted to hear. He couldn't do it.

Katniss softened as she watched his tortured expression, suddenly realizing he was millions of miles away. She knew he was struggling desperately. His eyes refocused on her, and he opened his mouth to speak but no words come out. She waited patiently, humbled by the affection brimming from his eyes as he looked down at her.

"When I saw him talking to you, I…" his voice died away, unable to articulate the panic and raw fear he had felt, "I was so far away and he was gripping that knife… he only had to reach out and… and I couldn't stop thinking about…" his voice died away as he looked hard into her wide mercury eyes. It was all he could offer, and she understood.

"I know… it's okay," she boldly reached up and ran her palm gently across his jaw. It was a timid touch and he recognized the fear in her eyes. She noticed some light bruising along his cheek bone, likely from the scuffle of dragging him from the room.

"Did you get in trouble?"

"No." Katniss released her breath at this, as the tension that had knotted deep into her shoulders slipped away. "Apparently this sort of thing happens often." Peeta's words came out slowly as he tried to focus on anything but the gentle touch of her palm on his jaw. He spoke softly, afraid that anything could break the moment. "You need to stay far away from him for the next two days… don't go near him."

"I have no intention of going near him," she said quietly, matching his soft voice.

"I suppose we can stop pretending."

Katniss' breath hitched as she wondered what he was referring to. Stop pretending that they didn't know each other? Or stop pretending that there wasn't something between them?

"How's your head?" He nodded at the bandage.

"I've had worse." She meant it to be a light joke. But suddenly they were both transported back to that shared dark memory. Peeta knew she'd had worse. He'd been there to witness the results from it. The moment grew serious once again as Katniss cleared her throat, "I think Effie was looking for me." She wasn't ready to talk about that with him.

Peeta backed away, too exhausted by the day to persuade her to stay. Her hand reached over to the knob of the door.

"I might go up to the roof after dinner… if… if you want to come up…" Katniss, shot him a shy glance, unsure of where this conversation left them.

Peeta sucked in a long low breath, and mustered his best smile, "There's no where else I'd rather be, Katniss."

Katniss slipped from the room, her face alight with a bright smile. It wasn't until she reached Effie in the dining room that she remembered to breath.

(To be cont.)

-I'm just not thrilled with that chap *sigh*… time to move on… I have big plans for the next chapter… it's going to get a little dark.

I made the horrible mistake of uploading the wrong revised chapter one… so I apologize for those of you who had to read that version. The document I uploaded was the rough draft for the first three chapters, along with a bunch of notes for future chapters. I am really bummed out by this, because you totally have serious spoiler alerts for future chapters now. Please keep reading, even though you know what's going to happen.

As always thanks for your feedback of any form. I love love love to hear your speculations… it really helps me to look at the story with renewed perspective so keep it coming! Thanks so much for sticking with this! You're all positively amazing! xoxo


	9. Chapter 9

A/N: I'm so sorry this took so long to get out. I think I've been experiencing writers block. Believe it or not, I've been working on these seven pages for months. I'm afraid we won't get to the roof in this chapter… however, the evening that young Katniss and Peeta originally met, and the dark event you've all been curious about is below. I could have waited longer, to make this chapter longer… but I'm too impatient to give it to you…. So here it is. Thank you kindly for those of you who have taken the time to write reviews. Even in the midst of hating what I wrote, it spurred me on. The chapter starts with an abstract dream sequence. Thanks so much guys!

Chapter 9:

Deep within the dark recesses of Peeta's sleeping mind, his subconscious sprung wide the latch to his locked and dormant memories.

Perhaps it was from the suggestion of the subject earlier in the day, or perhaps his ruthless subconscious had grown weary of his ceaseless avoidance of the issue, but deep in the throws of a pre-dinner nap, Peeta was thrust in to his darkest memory.

It was the day he officially met Katniss Mellark…

"_Peeta! Peeta!" he heard his mother shriek, from outside the door of their home. In a flash he was there, throwing it open with such force that the whole house shook. Coming up the lane, he saw his mother and Greasy Sae pushing a rickety wheel barrow. A lump of white sheet rested with in. Peeta watched as a limp small hand fell out of the sheet and he starred in shock as it swung back and forth limply with each jar of the wagon._

_His first thought had been that they'd killed someone. _

_From Greasy Sae's down cast brow, to his mother's terrified gaze, it made sense to the eleven year old. _

"_Peeta! Help us get her on the table," Iris gasped with a trembling voice, it oddly rang in his ears. Suddenly, Prim was there standing next to him, her little hand on his hip as she stared with wide blue eyes at the dangling hand._

"_Mama?" Her voice was faint, as if speaking through water as he struggled to hear it in his mind. The tremor of trepidation wavered through her little voice as she attempted to make sense of the startled state of their mother._

"_Go out the back of the house Primrose, and DO NOT come in until I tell you to. Do you understand!? Not until you're called," Iris was shrieking, but it sounded distorted and far away. Prim must have heard well enough, because she obeyed as Peeta gently pushed her from the doorway, and all at once she was gone. Peeta glanced at their oversized table, and made quick work of brushing the tin plates off onto the ground. They fell to the floor without a sound. Suddenly, his mother and Greasy Sae were next to him. "Peeta help us!" Her voice echoed. He suddenly watched from overhead as each of the three grabbed hold of the white sheet and pulled it up on to the table._

_As the pale sheet fell away, slipping off the edge of the table, the jagged black and blue body of a young girl was revealed. She had been stripped down to her underwear and training bra._

'_I know her' his murky mind recalled. All at once it felt like he was standing next to a freight train and nothing could be heard over the soul rattling pounding in his ears._

_Suddenly her gray eyes snapped open, and everything fell unnervingly silent. The sudden silence pierced through him painfully. Peeta leaned over her, unable to believe this was the quiet girl from his class. Dark steel grey melded with his blue as their eyes locked. _

_Katniss Mellark.  
_

_He had barely said two words to her all their years of school together… and there she was, lying on his kitchen table, her body thoroughly broken. _

_Suddenly Greasy Sae's voice sounded shrill and loud in his ear, like gun fire, "I found her lying behind the counter surrounded by broken glass. I don't know where Arabella was…" Greasy Sae's eyes clouded with fear at the mention of the heinous woman, "The bakery has been closed for three days… I just… I don't know how long she was lying there…" her voice hitched, as her eyes watered. Peeta watched his mother as she made quick work of assessing the damage with light touches to the skin of the young girl. _

"_Katniss," her voice echoed as she pulled down each of the girl's eyelids, examining her coherency, "Katniss, when did this occur?" Iris asked gently, her slight tremor betraying it's anxious undertone. _

"_Don't… know," Katniss rasped through a dry and cracked throat as she attempted to swallow._

"_Peeta, get her some water," Iris snapped, her alarm rising. Doing as told, Peeta floated to the well sink and suddenly he was next to Iris again, a glass of water in hand. His mother gently tipped a small amount into Katniss' mouth, and watched as the girl struggled to swallow, the fleshy gurgling sound of her attempts rang in his ear. _

_From his minds eye above the table, he looked down at her. She suddenly seemed illuminated, and everything else in the room faded to black. Her skin was lumpy, he recalled and pondered. In several places, sizeable bumps protruded like little mountains over the landscape of her war torn body. _

_Suddenly, back next to her side, he swallowed down bile as realization dawned. The lumps were broken bones attempting to jut out of her unusually pale skin. _

"_Grab the wooden spoon, Peeta."_

_It echoed and echoed throughout their unfamiliar home._

"_Katniss, dear… I'm so sorry, but your broken bones have already began to set crookedly." Suddenly he was behind his mother, returning from the kitchen, he went to hand the spoon to his mother. She made a short nod, "Put the handle in her mouth, Peeta." His eyes fluttered down to the stricken girl laid out on the table. Her terrified silver eyes locked with his once more. She attempted to shake her head no, but even the slightest movement was too much to manage as an onslaught of pain stilled her. _

_With trembling hands, the young boy reached for her bruised chin. Gently he touched her jaw, unsure of how to proceed. With mercury tears beginning to leak out of her eyes, Katniss reluctantly parted her lips for him, unable to force him, even in the throws of agony. He slipped the handle between her teeth, to safeguard her tongue from what was about to happen._

"_Katniss," Iris' voice wavered, "Katniss, darling, I'm so sorry…" She nodded to Greasy Sae who moved down to the end of he table by the girls black and blue feet, "Your bones have begun to heal… but they aren't set properly… We… we need to reset them. Do you understand? I'm going to have to re-break them, and reset them, so that they heal correctly. If… if I don't… the medical complications from this…. Well, it would be unlikely that you would ever walk properly." _

_Peeta swallowed hard, as the blood drained from his face. He looked down at her body. Her left collarbone was broken, as was her left wrist… the bone nearly poking through the inflamed skin. Both her legs were broken at both the right and left femurs, as well as her right shin bone. One stray rib protruded from the rest, the skin white and taught as it stretched over it, a contrast from the black skin around it. Her right shoulder was clearly dislocated, and her left hand looked as though someone had stomped on it repeatedly. Each finger was likely broken. _

_Peeta swallowed a wave of panic, as a simple thought shook him to the core; Will she die?_

"_Peeta, darling… I need your help… I need you," Iris pleaded, the ringing echoes increasing in volume._

"_I need you,"_

"_I need you," _

_Peeta's lungs stopped._

"_You have to keep her still."_

_Peeta's heart stopped._

"_I need you to hold her down…"_

_Peeta's eyes fluttered shut._

"_Keep her down."_

_Trembling hands reached out, and paused. With her left collarbone broken, and her right shoulder dislocated… how was he suppose to hold her down with out adding pain and damage?_

"_We'll do those last," Iris answered his unvoiced question, "You'll just have to make due…" _

_Peeta shuddered. His hands shaking uncontrollably, he placed one where her neck and good shoulder met, and the other below her broken collarbone, over the top of the gentle swell of her newly formed breast. _

_Mortified, he avoided her eyes, as Iris placed her hands on Katniss' shin, feeling for the break._

_The anguished cry that bubbled forth from the young girl at this made Peeta's blood petrify. She violently jerked, involuntary as it was, it took all of Peeta's might to hold her down as she screamed and thrashed. He could feel her heart racing just beneath his palm, and he stood over her, trying as hard as he could to keep her against the table. He heard the 'crack' of the bone, and a scream of agony was wretched from the girls' lungs, so raw and shrill it felt like a bullet to the heart._

Peeta snapped awake, the breath stole from his lungs as he threw away the covers. The sudden change in posture caused sweat to trickle down his body as he sat up straight in his Capitol bed.

Shaking, he rubbed his hands over his face as the too fresh memories of that night assaulted him. His heart hammered against the anvil of his chest, as he sucked in ragged breaths.

He had forcefully held her down as his mother broke and reset 12 of her bones. Her cries echoed freshly in his mind.

It hadn't been until Iris reached Katniss' collarbone that the girl was finally released from her agony, and had slipped into unconsciousness. After moving her off the table to his bed, Peeta had ran from the house, his mother calling after him. He had ran and ran, under the fence, out into the woods in the dead of night. He ran until his lungs were raw and he could no longer breath. Collapsing at the foot of a large oak, he could no longer hold back the tears. Feeling safe that no one could see him, he let them out unashamedly. Water leaking from his eyes, snot running from his nose, he had sobbed into his dirt caked hands until he fell asleep on the forest floor. That was the state in which his friend Gale had found him the next morning. They had walked back together, neither speaking a word.

Katniss had slept in an unconscious state for three days on his bed until Arabella Mellark had shown up with Cray. The interaction had been short with clipped words, and void of any sort of gratitude or emotion.

They'd never spoken of it. The trauma of that night had never once been discussed. Not with his mother, not with Prim, and certainly never with Katniss. Gale had attempted not long ago, in the quiet recesses of their forest sanctuary, to get Peeta to talk about it. But he couldn't.

Peeta ran a shaky hand through his hair as he stood and walked into the bathroom to splash water on his face. Letting out a long ragged breath, and looked at his reflection in the mirror. His eyes were bloodshot, and puffy dark circles hung just beneath.

Suddenly, commotion from the hallway drew his attention. He could barely hear Effie's shrill voice through the heavy concrete walls as she screamed at someone.

Not bothering to pull on a shirt, he ran to and flung his door open.

"This IS NOT allowed, Sir!" Effie bellowed, "You must leave at once!"

Peeta sprinted towards the large front foyer. Once he rounded the corner, his blood ran cold as he surveyed Paasch Vickram clasping Katniss to him possessively as an irate Effie wildly motioned for him to leave. Rage squeezed the air from his lungs, and just as he was about to charge, strong arms jerked him back behind a pillar. He was momentarily surprised at the strength in the iron grip that held him in place. His eyes flashed up to the serious and steely gaze of Haymitch.

"Let Effie handle it!" He growled low in the younger man's ear, and Peeta understood at once the command in his mentor's voice.

"I have every right to visit my Fiancé!" Vickram hissed, as he pushed Katniss further into the apartment.

"You MOST CERTAINLY do not! She is a tribute! This is a horrific breach of decorum! Unhand her at once, and exit the premises or I will have no choice but to get the peacekeepers involved!"

"This doesn't concern you!" Vickram barked, dismissing Effie with the practiced cruelty accustomed to the Capitol elite. Turning on Katniss, he pushed her back against the wall and with a rage filled face bellowed, "WHERE THE HELL DID YOU GO LAST NIGHT!?"

Peeta felt the sharp sting of fingernails piercing his skin as Haymitch attempted to keep him hidden.

Katniss turned her face away from him, terrified as he unleashed his roaring anger.

"WHERE WERE YOU!" He bellowed again.

"She had a meeting with her Mentor and Stylists you brute! I won't warn you again Sir!" Effie's shrill voice wavered as she lied. She suddenly realized she would have to make good on her threats and call in the Peace Keepers.

"YOU RAN OUT ON ME! I LOOKED LIKE A FOOL!" He continued to scream in her face, ignoring Effie all together.

"THAT'S IT! I'm calling President Snow's office!" Effie shrieked. This drew Vickram's attention at once. His steely gaze snapped to Effie's, and Katniss wondered how it was possible for Effie to not even flinch under such a violent stare. "I overheard you two talking last night, Sir," Effie's voice was suddenly quiet, but deadly serious as she perfectly articulated each word in her insufferable capitol accent, "He forbade you to see Katniss prior to the games," Katniss watched as she color drained from Vickram's face. "I wonder what he'll do when he finds out about your flagrant insubordination!" Effie tipped her chin up higher as her eyes became menacing slits. "To go against an order of the President of Panem is _treason_, Sir."

Like watching a chameleon change its color, a sudden stoic calmness washed over Vickram, stowing away his rage from a moment before.

"Surely, Miss, you are mistaken of what you thought you heard," his voice was unnervingly controlled, "I assure you, the President couldn't care less about something as trivial as one of his appointed officers paying a visit to his fiancé. However, to spare you the embarrassment of bothering him with such a trifling nuisance, I shall depart." Turning to Katniss, in one swift motion he pinned her back against the wall, "Goodnight, Darling," he bit out cruelly. Suddenly, his cold black eyes were drawn to the back of the foyer where an irate Peeta was being held back by a winded Haymitch. A wicked snarl lighted Vickram's lips as he took in the state of the young man.

As swift as a striking snake, Vickram grabbed Katniss's chin, and forcefully kissed her. She could feel his forked tongue forcing its way in between her lips, and she began to shudder. She made to jerk away, but he anticipated it, grabbing her tighter. She could feel his fingers digging in to her arm and chin, and she cried out in pain. The small part of her lips was all he needed and he plunged his tongue into her mouth, the two pointed ends exploring the depths within. Katniss began to gag as panic overtook her.

"ENOUGH!"

This time the bello came from, Haymitch. Vickram, jerked his head away and glared at the drunkard, who was barely keeping the boy at bay.

"It will be considered an unfair advantage to see someone from home before the games. She'll be disqualified if this gets out… and you and I both know what happens to those who are disqualified," Haymitch growled. This caused a momentary flicker to pass Vickram's eyes.

"Well we wouldn't want that, now would we?" Vickram snarled, reluctantly stepping away from the shaking girl. Effie punched the button for the elevator. It chimed as it opened.

"Good Evening, Sir!" She spat, motioning for him to enter. Vickram sent her a hate filled glare before turning back to Katniss.

"Apparently, I have not made my intentions clear enough to you. If you disobey me _again_…"

"OUT!" Haymitch barked. Vickram's face turned purple with rage at being interrupted. Wheeling around he pointed at the mentor, his long yellow fingernail finding him like the needle of a compass.

"I WON'T forget this Abernathy!" He bellowed. Turning on his heel, he entered the elevator, and slammed his hand on the button. The doors closed at once, and he was gone.

Katniss stood rigid against the wall. Too stricken to move, her hands flew to her face, as large sobs wracked her slight frame.

Peeta broke free from the exhausted Mentor, and he was at once at her side, placing a delicate palm against her cheek.

"Don't touch me!" She cried, as she wrenched herself from his touch, and fled through the hall to places unknown. Peeta felt slapped as he watched her retreating form. He took a step forward to follow her, only to feel the gentle guidance of a small female hand holding him back.

"Let her alone for a moment, Peeta. A young lady needs to collect her thoughts after events such as these." Effie's voice, no longer shrill, but rather matronly, soothed his nerves in delicate waves. He couldn't help but notice the expertise in her voice, as though she was familiar with such events. A side glance down to Effie, confirmed that indeed she was much more knowledgeable about the world she moved within than she had ever let on before. Never the less, Peeta acquiesced to her, and relented his pursuit, if only for the moment.

To be cont.

(Half of the roof scene is already written… )

Also I began an AU with Gale… Gotta make sure he finds and extraordinary love, right? When I am satisfied with it, I may just post it! Thanks Friends!

A note to Meowskii: You are great! Thanks for your encouraging words, they mean so much!


	10. Chapter 10

(A/N: Since it's been a long long time since some of you have read, I've included the last bit from the previous chapter. Skip if necessary.)

"_Apparently, I have not made my intentions clear enough to you. If you disobey me again…"_

"_OUT!" Haymitch barked. Vickram's face turned purple with rage at being interrupted. Wheeling around he pointed at the mentor, his long yellow fingernail finding him like the needle of a compass._

"_I WON'T forget this Abernathy!" He bellowed. Turning on his heel, he entered the elevator, and slammed his hand on the button. The doors closed at once, and he was gone. _

_Katniss stood rigid against the wall. Too stricken to move, her hands flew to her face, as large sobs wracked her slight frame. _

_Peeta broke free from the exhausted Mentor, and he was at once at her side, placing a delicate palm against her cheek._

"_Don't touch me!" She cried, as she wrenched herself from his touch, and fled through the hall to places unknown. Peeta felt slapped as he watched her retreating form. He took a step forward to follow her, only to feel the gentle guidance of a small female hand holding him back._

"_Let her alone for a moment, Peeta. A young lady needs to collect her thoughts after events such as these." Effie's voice, no longer shrill, but rather matronly, soothed his nerves in delicate waves. He couldn't help but notice the expertise in her voice, as though she was familiar with such events. A side glance down to Effie, confirmed that indeed she was much more knowledgeable about the world she moved within than she had ever let on before. Never the less, Peeta acquiesced to her, and relented his pursuit, if only for the moment. _

CHAPTER TEN:

A crisp chime announced the arrival of the elevator car. The doors slid apart, spilling light onto the dimly lit terrace as its lone passenger stepped past the sheltering threshold of the lift to feel the chill wind sting his cheeks.

Peeta had been looking for Katniss everywhere. After heeding Effie's advice, he had let her be. Denying the desperate impulse to chase her down and crash her to his chest, he stilled himself. Waiting in the living room had been agonizing. His mind was assaulted with her grief stricken face. His heart was laid waste by her denial of his touch, and his pride stunned, by the harsh yet breathless command of it. He focused his mind on his concern for Katniss. If he were to let it wander for even the briefest of moments, it would turn rancid with hate for Vickram. Now was not the time to be seduced away by an untamable rage. Hate was easy. Hate was basic. But that was not what _she _needed from him right now. So he swallowed down his anger like stomach acid creeping up a throat, and thought only of Katniss. And he waited. But as an hour came to a close, anxiousness overtook him. He tapped his leg impatiently as he sat on the shiny leather couch, starring out the windows at the bright city lights. How long was long enough? Unable to stand it a moment longer, he rose from his chair, and went to her room. He just needed to make sure she was okay. That's all.

However, after a thorough search of her room, and bathroom, closet even, it was clear she had decided to hide away elsewhere. He made a quick search of the rest of the floor wide apartment only to come up empty.

After opening all of the kitchen cabinets… just to be sure, he realized she must be on the roof. There was nowhere else she could be.

And so he found himself seeking out the dark corners of the roof, searching for her. Rounding the walkway, he came upon a small alcove, partially hidden by an ostentatious planter overflowing with exotic palms and orchids, and saw her.

She looked truly pitiful, slumped against the brick exterior wall in the most dejected manner. Her knees where pulled up, and a half empty bottle of cinnamon liquor was grasped loosely in her small hand. With her knees up, her blue capitol dress had slid down her thighs, and he was granted a full view of lean legs and bare feet. His eyes were transfixed at the soft skin of her upper thigh, exposed as the delicate silk fell and pooled perfectly to hide anything further from his questing gaze. As he glanced up, he was sobered by her red-rimmed eyes. She shivered violently in the cold night air.

At once Peeta pulled off his thick cardigan and walked purposefully towards her while trying to subdue his fear of crying girls, and emotional displays. He knew that she knew someone was up there. She would have heard the elevator. But even still, as he approached she made no acknowledgement of his presence. Continuing to stare out at the skyline, her eyes where glazed over listlessly.

Peeta stopped a few feet from her, as his anxiousness sprouted legs and stomped all over his heart. He shouldn't be here. She obviously wanted to be alone. Never before had he been so unsure of himself.

He waivered for what seemed an eternal moment as he vacillated between calling out to her, and turning on his heel to grant her the privacy she obviously desired. In the end, the decision of staying or leaving was made for him.

Her voice was so tiny that he barely heard it over the whirring wind of the high-rise. As the meaning of her words registered in his mind, his heart slumped to the bottom of his stomach.

"That was my first kiss."

Tears leaked from the corners of her eyes and she brushed them away hastily with the inside of her wrist, unable to look at him.

Peeta stood so still his body ached.

"It wasn't supposed to be like that…" Her voice broke with a sob, and she collapsed into herself smashing her face into the apex of her knees. Her tears and whimpers leaked out, wrenched forth and shed into the crisp night air.

Peeta's mouth went dry as his mind mourned with her. Innocence lost, the bubble of childhood burst violently, instead of let out, like a slow hiss. She had been thrust into a situation too cruel for such a gentle-hearted soul. Peeta sucked in a sharp breath as his heart raged with an overwhelming urge to protect.

Katniss swallowed a lumpy breath that burned her throat as it went down. Hastily she pawed at the tears on her cheeks, desperate to rid herself of both the moisture and the emotions coursing forth. She continued taking in deep breaths until finally on the sixth one it refused to tremor. She stood up on shaky legs, bracing her arm against the brick wall behind her. She lifted, her chin, holding her head up high, as she continued to suck in calming breaths.

Peeta didn't need to see this, she thought idly. He didn't need to see her reduced to tears at the hands of a wicked man. He needed a partner he could count on not to lose her mind over something so trivial. She knew she had to be strong, for him, for Prim, and for herself if they were to survive the coming days. As she stood she shook out her hands and screamed in her mind to stop the cowardice shivers quaking down her body. She looked out at all that glitters and her eyes were black with resolve.

Peeta watched on in awe as he saw the change overtake her. Courage had become palpable as he witnessed a fierce tenacity slowly possess the frightened girl from a moment before. Her summons of strength was both humbling and alluring, and he suddenly felt unfit to be in her presence. Surely one such as she was destined for so much more than the life before her.

An unexplainable feeling poured over him like molten liquid exploding from his heart, until he was fully enveloped. It was suffocating in its urgent and savage demands. It gripped and squeezed him, bending his will to its own, and before he fully knew what was happening… he was on the move.

Katniss was unaware.

She was unaware as a firm body moved so intimidatingly close. She was unaware when cracked and strong hands grabbed her roughly. She slowly began to notice when her back met with the unyielding rough of the brick wall behind her. When her exhausted muscles slowly stood up and took notice of the agonizing heat that scoured down her body from the feel of his fingers through her thin dress. Her eyes refocused as fission ignited in her core, fingering out on frazzled synapses. Her flesh shuddered relentlessly in the aftermath, leaving behind such a crater. All at once, her only design was to be flooded and filled.

As her awareness dawned, her mind shattered the fog from a moment before and her eyes closed in on the most elegant shade of blue. Emotion unknown charged forth and warred between them. She would know those eyes anywhere.

Peeta Everdeen, the boy who hated her.

But that wasn't entirely true. She knew that now. Perhaps his opinion of her had changed. Or perhaps something honest had finally surfaced. She looked upon his face as his hands dropped back to his sides. It was the same angular jaw as before. The same pink cupid's bow lips that had always transfixed her before. The same long dark lashes that always made his eyes all the more appealing. The same rosy hue that up lit his cheeks in such a way to steal your breath. Everything was the same. Everything, except the look in his eyes.

Instead of the guarded disdain that used to brim forth, an alluring darkness had replaced them. So dark, like the unknown venture waiting beyond the shadowed mouth of an abyss.

Intuition.

That's the only thing that guided her. This innate 'awareness' that somehow understood how two bodies might meld. Her lungs stopped as he paused barely a breath from her lips. His black gaze ignited such a fear with in her, but she bravely met his eyes, knowing his intentions and quietly drowning in them.

Their bodies hovered just shy of touching as a current pulsed between them, electric and raw. Like the rolling frigid air of the north colliding with the hot and weighty air of the south. Two fronts on the cusp of a violent storm.

Peeta slowly died as he watched her eyes flutter shut, and her chin tip up gently. It was invitation enough.

What he surely meant to be a gentle moment was destroyed by the depth and urgency and need of the atmosphere they had created.

Not so much a kiss, as a collision.

Leaning forward sharply, her lips molded perfectly to his warm and firm as calloused fingertips ghosted down the curve her ear before his palm found purchase at her jaw. His thumb brushed up over her cheekbone, tickling her lashes before sweeping back.

The gentle musings of his right hand where juxtaposed starkly by the rough demands of his left. Firmly slipping past her ribs, it circled to her back at the dip in her waist and crashed her body tightly against his, eliciting a small gasp to pass from her full lips to his. They both shuddered at the sound.

Slow and strong and languid his lips pulled and melded against hers. Imitating his ebb and flow, she grew bolder as she followed his lead. Splaying her hands out against his broad chest, she pulled her fingers in to grasp recklessly at his cotton shirt, pulling him closer still. Not half satisfied with their closeness, she released her grip on his shirt, and slid her hands up over his beating heart to wrao around his neck. Her breasts pressed against his hard chest in such a way that set new waves of heat shuddering down her body.

The only thing she could understand through the haze and senselessness was that it wasn't enough. She wanted more. It wasn't enough. Though fully ignited, her appetite only grew. As their kiss deepened and his tongue ghosted over her bottom lip, his hand at her back dipped low and pressed her forward against him. Into him.

Her body shuddered as she felt the most indescribable pleasure build at her core from the contact. It elicited another delicious gasp from the girl in his arms, and their kiss broke momentarily as her dark eyes flipped open and stared into his.

"I've wanted you so long," he breathed as his dark eyes bore into hers. At his words, her heart and mind exploded into action as they mutually came to a peaking decision. There would be no coming back from this.

To illustrate his point, he pressed her solidly against the wall, and pulled his hand from her lower back down her thigh and up under her dress. Wrapping his hand around the back of her inner thigh, his fingertips ghosted her soft skin intimately. Her heart hammered in her chest as hot shudders worked their way down past her stomach at the light touch. He pulled her leg up positioning at his side. He was only mildly surprised that he met no resistance. She was fully pliable in his hands, fully trusting, and fully unlocked. She arched her back at the new angle of contact, and let out a breathless and throaty sigh.

He knew he should go slower. He knew she was inexperienced and he was pushing her too far too fast. But his mind was gone. Too overcome by the way she curved herself, pressing her breasts against his chest. He was too lulled by the gentle strokes of her fingers against the back of his neck. Too intoxicated by her sweet cinnamon laced lips pulling against his own. Too inflamed by the way she pressed herself against him in the most intimate of places, her desperation for harder pressure obvious.

He moved his lips down to where her jaw and neck met, sucking gently. Her eyes popped open at the sensation before fluttering shut once more in time with her breathy exhale. He continued his path down her neck, until all at once they heard the elevator chime. Both froze, chests heaving as panic pulled them into the present. He dropped her leg, and pushed her further back into the darkened alcove behind him, his eyes never leaving the direction of the offending sound. They could hear someone rustling around, and the distinct sound of a key into a lock. Three small beeps, shrill and sharp resounded from around the corner. All around them, succinct short hisses announced the start of the automatic sprinklers planted in the flower beds.

It wasn't until the first few drops of icy water fell on their heads and soaked through their clothing that they realized what was happening. Katniss snapped her eyes to Peeta's as the pause allowed her to process what had just transpired between them. He could sense the change in her demeanor as the heated atmosphere from a moment before was literally doused with cold water. Her eyes were riddled with a raw vulnerability, deep and tangible. She made no attempt to hide it because she saw no point. Without thought he placed his hands on either side of her face as a huge grin spread out on his. He couldn't survive it if her fear coxed her towards regret. As his blue eyes glittered with a contagious joy, hers succumbed to the emotion, as the vapor of doubt was washed away with each pelt of water. In moments, they were soaked through, and Katniss could do little else but laugh and shiver at the absurdity of the moment. She marveled at how they always found themselves in such situations. His breath stopped at the melodic sound of her laugh and he couldn't help but join her in it. Tugging at her arms suddenly he pulled her to him in a fierce hug, burying his face in her neck as the fabricated rain fell around them in a downpour.

She wrapped her arms around him just a fiercely, feeling the hard muscles of his back easily through his drenched shirt. The feeling of being wrapped in his arms caused her to feel an emotion she rarely felt. Safe. Like how home is meant to feel. He pulled away, a smile still lingering on his lips, as he gently tipped her chin up and placed a long slow kiss on her lips. When he pulled away and looked down at her he was certain she had never been more beautiful to him. Water drops kissed her eyelashes, a few stands of hair where plastered to her face, and despite the cold and wet, she was glowing.

"Come on, there's a fireplace in my room." He entwined his hand with hers as he led her towards the elevator. She opened her mouth and nearly blurted that there was a fireplace in each room, until she realized he intended to spend more time with her. A shiver worked its way down her spine, caused not by the strong wind against her wet body, but rather by an emotion she hadn't felt this fully since her father had died. Her heart ached at the thought.

She was wanted.

To be continued.

A/N: I've not abandoned this. It's just taking an absurd amount of time to write. I've been editing for ages, and took special care with my word choices for this chapter as I felt it was an important turning point for them. I took my time with it. Thank you kindly for sticking with me, and for your feedback. It means more than you know.


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